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al-Bundy Martyr Brigades

The Brigades are seething that there's no Inflatable Muhammed!

But at least we're...

FIRST!!

The Exorcist

THE POWER OF CHOMSTEIN COMPELS ME!
THE POWER OF CHOMSTEIN COMPELS ME!
THE POWER OF CHOMSTEIN COMPELS ME!

Libertarian666

Some idiot didn't get a big enough oxygen pump.
We salute you, our half-inflated Dark Lord!

"Do what thou wilt shall be the whole of the free market!"
- Allystur Anton von Mises Randencrowburger

MMM'Billy

Clearly the fault of the j000z!

aha

Arbs will want to know if the inflatable Muhammed would like to be in a threesome.

shiningwolf

You are my literary hero

Sounds like those Bible thumpers beat you black and blue one time too many

Being from the Bible belt myself - I have many permanent scars from those thrashings

( to the inflatable Muhammed comments }
I think the followers prefer camels to prophets for their threesome partners - due to the bonus values of fleas crawling around stimulating them in all the right areas
But who knows - Possibilities abound

Mumblix Grumph

Hasbro? Bah! The only REAL Inflatable Jesus® was made by Wham-O in the late 1960's.

The first ones were inflated by a small C02 canister. Some lunkhead in Kenosha, Wisconsin swallowed the cannister, swelled up like Rush Limbaugh at an Old Country Buffet and then exploded. Ralph Nader sued the company and that's when they started using the hand pump. It was a disaster. When you need pneumatic salvation, you don't want to mess around with a damn pump!

Wham-O sold the entire religious line to Hasbro in 1974. My mom bought me a Holy Water Wiggle®, but it really sucked. They tried a product tie-in with the movie The Exorcist. Maybe you saw the commercials. "The power of Christ compels you to have fun in the sun!" The entire marketing team was canned after church riots broke out in Memphis. I think Bob Shrum headed that ad campaign.

I guess Hasbro started using those little cans of compressed air that they sell at Office Depot to clean dust out of a computer.

I should buy an Inflatable Jesus® for old times sake. If nothing else, I can use it in the car to drive in the HOV lane.

Fist of Etiquette

One night a Savior had a dream. He dreamed He was walking along the beach with a junior senator from New York. Across the sky flashed scenes from her life. For each scene, He noticed two sets of footprints in the sand; one belonging to Him, and the other to the senator.

When the last scene of her life flashed before Him, He looked back at the footprints in the sand. He noticed that many times along the path of her life, there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed that it happened at certain campaign stops and fundraising events. This really bothered Him and He questioned the senator about it.

"Senator, you said that once I decided to follow you, you'd walk with Me all the way. But I have noticed that during the most troublesome speaking engagements in your career there is only one set of footprints. I don't understand why, when your constituents needed Me most, you would leave Me."

The senator replied, "My precious, precious child, I love You and I would never leave You. It's just, when I need to show the Left I haven't abandoned their enlightened ideals, You become kind of a burden. So, when You see only one set of footprints in the sand, it was when I had chucked You into the ocean."

Looking back upon the sand, the senator then remarked, "What a great place to build a house."

Bush4Ever

My LyfePartner wants to know where the inflate valve is placed on the Inflatable Jesus. S/he says s/he knows where s/he'd put it!

Bush4Ever

Has anyone considered that Mrs William Jefferson Clinton's communication with an Imaginary Friend might be a sign that it is time we just surrender to every country in The Blessed United Nations?

Dave

How I long for the days where the hate-filled howling christofascist sheep could be sedated by Big Bill Clinton carrying a bible the size of a tombstone outside a church. They would see the big dog doing that and go back to reasonless sleep

If Al Gore gets in the race(fingers crossed!)his campaign slogan can be "I'm just like Jesus, but a lot more caring and smart"

The Exorcist

"where the inflate valve is placed on the Inflatable Jesus"

And is the valve uncircumsized?

Dodger

Aaaaaaarrrrrrrrgggggggghhhhhhh!!!!!1!!

Che

As a true progessyve, I have to know how anatomically correct is this Jesus blow up doll? Does it have all the important orifices (Like there is an unimportant one!)? How will it feel about being locked up in a trunk all day with a ball gag and a Teletubbies doll?

I have to admit my naivety. Whenever I saw "Jesus Loves You" carved into a mens' room stall or written on an overpass, I had no idea it was actually an advertisement for Hasbro.

csason


so..Does Inflatable Jesus (pronounced Hey Soooos) leave a carbon footprint...or is it WaterWalker exempt ?

The Exorcist

Hasbro? Who's the bro? This explains the black Jesus and to some degree the Obama Jesus, but what do they call the white Jesus? HasKKKing or HasKingOfPop?

And isn't Hasbro a subsidiary of Halliburton? So Halliburton controls the sElections, the imploding skyscrapers and bin Laden's dialysis machine - and now they're moving in on 80% of the population and those tax free donations.

Sure, they're just KKKrischins who primarily vote Rethuglican anyway so you want to see them taken advantage of. But that money shouldn't belong to Hasbro or their Halliburton masters. I'd much rather see those tax-free dollars going to the DNP so they can change tax-free into tax-increase, just like Jesus turned water into wine.

Mark Martin

I thought that thing was just a giant hemorrhoid. Thanks for clearing that up!

Son of the South™

What about the separation of Church and State?!?!?!

And who hid my inflatable Gaia? She's hot . . . and willing.

SoS

Intellectual Conservative

White, Black and Obama??

Oh man .. I need to not be drinking a soda when I read this. I just blew $70 on a new PC-gamers keyboard and it's now infested with soda spew .. LOLOL!!

Che

The Brigades are seething that there's no Inflatable Muhammed!

Sorry, Al. Actually, the R&D wasn't able to keep the doll deflated. No matter what they did, the Muhammed doll kept blowing itself up.

csason

"..I need to not be drinking a soda when I read this.. "

yes, there should be some kind of warning.. I got nailed the other day and Larry
has yet to apologize. I know he's busy...what with Inflatable Jesus' popping out
of everybody's ass.

aha

Kinda like Whack A Mole, isn't it?

aha

Che...Che...Che. What am I going to do with you? The Mohammed version might give everyone a perforated colon.

The Exorcist

"The Mohammed version might give everyone a perforated colon."

CHA-CHING! That'll be $25, Take On Me!

I trademarked "Perforated Colon" long before Misster/Sister/Twister/Blister/KissedHer/FistHer Ed cornered me in the barn. Of course, that was a few centuries after Mohammad impregnated his goat, but Moslem sex is Moslem sex so pay up.


camojack

"White, Black, and Obama."

Saved the best part for last, eh? Bravo...

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