California has always been light years ahead of the rest of the nation in the way of progressive reforms. Their bold new answer to the barbaric practice of spanking children is no exception.
State assemblywomyn Sally Lieber will introduce legislation this week to make spanking your child a crime punishable by a $1000 fine and up to one year in prison. However, stabbing a surgical vaccum into your baby's skull and sucking its brains out will remain one hundred percent legal, as guaranteed by the Constitution.
"I think it's pretty hard to argue you need to beat a child," says Lieber. "Is it OK to whip a 1-year-old or a 6-month-old or a newborn?"
Of course not. Putting aside for a moment the severe physical trauma a grown adult’s open hand can inflict on a little baby’s backside, a child who is spanked can also develop serious psychological disorders, such as self-discipline and respect for authority. As studies have further shown, parents who were disciplined as children are 78% more likely to discipline their own kids. It’s an endless cycle of abuse that no one has had the courage to fight until now.
Instead of spanking, Lieber encourages parents to reason with their toddlers, forming a relationship based on positive reinforcement and a mutal understanding of each other’s roles within the family heirarchy.
A request for an interview with Lieber was denied, as she is busy bailing her teenagers out of jail.
personally I refuse to reason with any child who refuses to be spanked...
except my own of course..and if called on to do so, the Leiber children.
Posted by: csason | January 21, 2007 at 07:44 PM
Reason with a toddler!???
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Posted by: JannyMae | January 21, 2007 at 08:12 PM
Sucking out the brains of a tumor-like growth in a progressive womb? Would that be a Hoover™ or an Eureka™? I have some money to invest.
Posted by: libmeister | January 21, 2007 at 08:19 PM
"Spare the Rod"
Not on my watch!
Posted by: The Exorcist | January 21, 2007 at 09:06 PM
"Spare the Rod"
Not on my watch!
Posted by: The Exorcist | January 21, 2007 at 09:06 PM
By the by, Janny! Congrats on Da Bears but I don't know about them winning the Superbowl. My money is on the team with the black coach.
Speaking of which. I'm setting up a charity that collects one dollar every time we hear someone falling all over themselves over the fact that, not only has a black coach made the Superbowl after 40 years of the NFL's written policy of excluding them, but it's a full-on twofer. I expect to retire from my day job of exorcising from the proceeds of this non-profit endeavor.
It's hardly a surprise to a black Republican that a black coach/any other occupation can reach the highest levels of their chosen occupation. But that it happened during the reign of a president who sends racist hurricanes to poorly governed regions of the country is a shocker!
I think I made $500 off of Shannon Sharpe the first night.
It could be worse. Just imagine how many times we would've been reminded of Bush's disdain for black people if the Saints hadn't remembered they were the Saints when the first snowflake fell in ChiTown. If only snowflakes weren't white, they'd have had a chance. Damn that Bush!
Posted by: The Exorcist | January 21, 2007 at 09:20 PM
damn those white snowflakes...!!
Posted by: csason | January 21, 2007 at 09:23 PM
I'm relieved that the State of California has decided that sending men with guns to hurl parents face-first onto the pavement, perform invasive personal searches, and shove them in cement cages is the answer to the growing problem of using physical discipline with a child who's not versed in Newton's theories on the collision of solid objects in the specific application of a 3-year-old wandering onto a residential street. Perhaps California could issue the Principia Mathematica to all newborns so they can brush-up on Newton's 3-laws of motion. I think intensive courses in thermodynamics and conductive heat-transfer will also help prevent the touching of the glowing orange objects in the kitchen.
Posted by: Moonchild | January 21, 2007 at 09:25 PM
Well, if you recall, I did say that there had to be a strong Brees(ze) in Chicago, if the Saints were gonna go marchin' in to the Super Bowl. The Brees kinda fizzled out, because of those damned white snowflakes.
Bush does it, again.
Posted by: JannyMae | January 21, 2007 at 09:25 PM
Actually Salley is well versed on raising children - she has not been jaded by actually raising any herself. She does have a cat, and the cat attests that Salley never once hit her - well maybe once. Not actually having children actually helps in telling 'breeders' how to raise their children. Breeders tend to have emotional attachments of some type to children and are thus not logical as Salley, a non-bredder, is. Also, progressive womyn do not have children - they make sure that any growths within them are removed, so Salley is mainly helping to protect children of KKKonstervatives. With any luck, growing up with expert guidance given by Salley and other progressive womyn will straighten these poor children out and make them into progressives. There needs to be a supply of progressive children since progressive womyn are too busy fighting Bu$hilter to produce children. It's all logical.
Posted by: Oaktown Cherlie | January 21, 2007 at 09:26 PM
Speaking of snow, there may be snow here in Phoenix tonight...
!!!!!
Stinking global warming.
Posted by: JannyMae | January 21, 2007 at 09:28 PM
Charlie, that reminds me of my child psychology instructor that I had in college. Bachelor in his late twenties, telling us how to discipline a child.
I didn't have a kid then, myself, but I recall the older women with kids smiling and rolling their eyes. Guy had some great theory goin' there!
Hehehe.
Posted by: JannyMae | January 21, 2007 at 09:33 PM
If adults would just learn to ask, or even beg their children to act nicely they will. The same works in our criminal system.
Posted by: DoubleU | January 21, 2007 at 11:59 PM
I would gladly "discipline" your children(and adults) for a small fee at Dom Kinky Bee's Den of Pleasure and Iniquity and Re-education camp. I also don't live in KKKaleeforneeyah, so it is perfectly legal for me to spank your children. The worse they misbehave, the harder the spanking. We guarantee results, too. We will have your children straightened up and acting like respectable, little angels in no time. If they step out of line, all you have to do is don a Dominatrix outfit and pull out the whip.
If you don't believe me, ask a few of my regular clients. The Exorcist(now running our Re-education camp) and Irish(still smart(mouth)ing from his last beating.
Posted by: Dom Kinky Bee | January 22, 2007 at 12:27 AM
Strike a blow for obedience!
Posted by: camojack | January 22, 2007 at 12:54 AM
Corporal Punishment: There's Just No Beating It
Posted by: Fist of Etiquette | January 22, 2007 at 04:34 AM
Well we all have the example of Auntie Janet Reno. She never had to wallop Elian Gonzales for paddling his canoe to Florida.
Posted by: aha | January 22, 2007 at 05:13 AM
If you beat your child, make sure you back it up by something that will help them remember the beating, like: You little shit!! I wish you never were born!!!
Posted by: Bush4Ever | January 22, 2007 at 06:13 AM
Then there was Michael Fay who was caned in Singapore for vandalism. Our great Black President didn't send any warships, Special Forces or even Rangers to rescue him. Now that Hillary is running for President, I bet he regrets that now.
Posted by: aha | January 22, 2007 at 06:30 AM
To get this great law passed we should use "do it for the good of the children" to get what we want.
Then after a few years we can change our slogan to "shut up, and get into the boxcar"
Posted by: Dave | January 22, 2007 at 07:19 AM
My kids played in the snow in Maricopa, AZ where I live, so I spanked the living crap out of them! Then my stoopid Marine Corp brother gave me a wedgie and and noogie right in front of them!
I plan on exhuming my old man and whipping his skeletel butt for all the times he spanked me and told me to "listen like your brother does"...
Posted by: Arbiter | January 22, 2007 at 07:31 AM
We didn't get any snow in Gilbert, Arbiter. My boy was disappointed.
**pouting**
I did have to scrape ice off my windshield this morning, though!
...that doesn't count, does it?
Rats!
Posted by: JannyMae | January 22, 2007 at 07:49 AM
"A request for an interview with Lieber was denied, as she is busy bailing her teenagers out of jail."
And of course we all know the reason they are in jail is because "society failed them". You see, even I, all the way over here in Texas, am responsible for the failure of her children to have the self-esteem to reach their full potential - you are all just as culpable. Now aren't you ashamed? I think this underscores the need to have such a "No Discipline" bill passed at the federal level and "lovingly" enforced by Big Brother fom on high.
How 'bout it?
Posted by: ExTXBigot | January 22, 2007 at 08:05 AM
I got it..
A slogan to get this brave law passed.
ABORT YOUR FETUS NOW, SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO BEAT THE CHILD LATER.
Posted by: Dave | January 22, 2007 at 08:09 AM
JannyMae, sorry about the lack of snow in Gilbert. Of course if Bush had signed the Kyoto Treaty we'd have plenty of snow for every one...
Posted by: Arbiter | January 22, 2007 at 08:59 AM