The Worlds Greatest Terrorists have been busy the past few days. Two Muslims were nabbed in Ohio last Tuesday for the terrible crime of possessing too many cell phones. Six Egyptian Muslims were arrested and five more are being hunted down after failing to show up at the University of Montana. Excuse me, but if not going to college makes you a criminal, then the entire GOP should be behind bars.
Then just yesterday, the entire Islamabad Philharmonic Orchestra was rounded up in Great Britain for attempting to board a plane with a bottle of Snapple. So Rummy gets a parcel of new innocents to torture, in addition to the millions of innocent Muslims Bush and Blair have already murdered in Iraq and Afghanistan.
Meanwhile, as the Shrub and his lapdog are patting themselves on their backs, thousands of non-Muslims are waltzing through airport security unmolested.
Oh my Goddess! It’s a TERRORIST! Get her Bush! GET HER!!!!
What’s the matter, Shrub? Her skin isn’t dark enough for you?
There’s another one, Dumbya!! BOMB THE CRAP OUT OF HIS WEDDING RECEPTION AND HAUL HIM OFF TO GITMO!
No? Doesn’t fit into your stereotypical age group, eh?
How about this guy:
Holy crap, he's BLACK! And he's twenty-two in dog years! And he's on his way to a mosque!
KILL HIM, SHRUB! KILL HIM BEFORE HE GETS AWAY!!!
If I’ve said it once, I’ve said it a thousand times, and I will say it once more for the hearing impaired: RACIAL PROFILING DOES NOT WORK. Anyone with half a brain and a progressive blog knows that racial profiling restricts the field of suspects down to far too narrow a sample of the population and encourages laziness among investigators.
Besides, in a free, colorblind society, a radical Muslim male attempting to board a commercial aircraft is just a tourist until he starts slashing throats, and then he must be considered innocent until proven guilty. But as it’s been made abundantly clear by yesterday's events, that “free society” we once lived in no longer exists.
Good one Bush4Ever! Those commie pinko squirrels have got to be stopped!
Posted by: Arbiter | August 12, 2006 at 06:07 AM
I bet those are Cuban squirrels on a mission to harvest new intestines or Fidel. Do you know that Cuban squirrels have the lowest infant mortality rate in the western hemisphere?
Posted by: Che | August 12, 2006 at 06:30 AM
Che, this could lead to another Squirrel Thistle Crisis!
Posted by: Arbiter | August 12, 2006 at 07:36 AM
Come on, folks! Which conspiracy theory is more likely to be true?
Terrorists, excuse me, "freedom fighters," planning terror attacks, or Bush and Blair creating an elaborate hoax wherein they play on people's fears by arresting phony terrorists.
Look at their approval ratings, and tell me they wouldn't go out of their way to lie about this! Boy, some people will believe anything...
...just check out, "Ryan's," website.
Posted by: JannyMae | August 12, 2006 at 08:59 AM
OH MY GAWD, CINDY SHEEHAN JUST DIED!!!
Oh, not just yet.
Sheehan Treated for Dehydration in Texas
Aug 12 12:27 AM US/Eastern
By ANGELA K. BROWN
Associated Press Writer
WACO, Texas
Anti-war demonstrator Cindy Sheehan was hospitalized Friday evening for dehydration and exhaustion after fasting for more than a month and protesting earlier this week in 100-degree weather, friends and relatives said.
Posted by: The Exorcist | August 12, 2006 at 09:00 AM
Janny Mae, you are spot on! 9/11 was an inside job. Charlie Sheen said so.
Exorcist, thank you for sharing this tragic news. Unlike her son Casey who died fighting Bush's war for oil/Israel/Haliburton/poll numbers, if Cindy dies she will have died for a good and noble cause. I'll get back to you when I find out what that is.
Posted by: Arbiter | August 12, 2006 at 09:15 AM
irish is back. What a yerk. 9-11 was an inside job? Does John Fraude Kerry know about this? I mean he wants a dialogue with Hezbollah to show the strength of the strong. Did you know that he is eminently qualified to do this because he took a grain of rice in the butt in Vietnam and surrendered to the VietCong in Phrance during talks?
Posted by: PTPFP | August 12, 2006 at 11:07 AM
I think Mahmoud Tatoo AmmaNeedaBloJob probably has a handle on Foxy White Cindy Sheeman's just and noble cause.
I don't know about the rest of you, but I find it almost as credible as Irish Ryan AmmaNeedaBloJob's credible conspiracies that the day after Bush bans sports drinks Piece Mother Sheeman collapses from dehydration.
If you can't carry a bottle of Gatorade onto a plane then the trains, taxi's, bicycles built-for-two and peace-buses can't be far behind.
Posted by: The Exorcist | August 12, 2006 at 11:21 AM
That ain't all John Forktongue Queery took in the butt, PT.
You ought to see what goes on down in the basement of Terazor's mansion where she keeps him chained to a pipe next to the rest of her servants.
Posted by: The Exorcist | August 12, 2006 at 11:24 AM
I'd like to question the timing of all this. Doesn't it seem suspicious that this so-called "terror" "plot" was exposed within one year and a day of a US election? What are the chances of that?
And nobody has explained why somebody would blow up a jet while he's inside it. That would be similar to suicide. And how do you detonate gatorade? I don't understand any of this. Bush and Blair must think we are all intensely stupid.
Posted by: They can't fool me !! | August 12, 2006 at 12:38 PM
amedinajad, takes the words right out of our mouths. He would make a great progressyve Democrat. Shaitan himself would be proud to have such a mentor like amendinajad.
Clearly the Muslim freedom fighters and liberal progressyves are showing the way to global peace by having this harmonic convergence in opposition to Bush and Blair's phony "war on terrorism". Everyone knows it wasn't 19 Muslim lovers of peace but rather Bu$Hitler who brought down the Twin Towers that were rigged for demolition to falsely implicate Muslim fundamentalists. Groovy!
Posted by: libmeister | August 12, 2006 at 12:46 PM
You're, like, totally right They can't fool me!! Why embrace Occam's Razor and reality when a good conspiracy theory would do?
I hope you have your tinfoil hat on because I think you might be hearing some black helicopters coming from you since you busted Bush and Blair with THE TRUTH (whatever that may be from day to day). Get rid of your cellphone, too, since it has a GPS tracker imbedded in it! We're all hiding under Larry's sink. I advise you to do the same until the coast is clear.
Posted by: libmeister | August 12, 2006 at 12:51 PM
while Israel kills more innocent people
Israel is killing its own citizens? I didn't think they would copy the tactics of Hezbollah using Lebanese civilians as human shields and keeping civilians from evacuating from southern Lebanon.
But I guess one man's human shield is another man's cannonfodder. Of course, in the final analysis, we know we can depend on the mainstream media to never takes sides and always tell the unvarnished truth, unless, of course, a story can be spun to undermine the Bu$Hitler/neo-KKKon and the Zionist Israeli regimes. After all, the ends does justify the means in our reality-based progressyve community.
We must continue to speak truth to power!
Posted by: libmeister | August 12, 2006 at 01:11 PM
My goodness even hate Bush blogs are to benigned for some.The deep end of the pool is always the most dangerous.Progressives should play in the shallow end,less chance of intellectual harm from verbal drowning.
Posted by: jainphx | August 12, 2006 at 03:41 PM
Good work, libmeister.
Anyone with half a brain could get all the information they need from the variety of sources you cite in your hyperlinks. Perhaps not A'NedInAJed, but that's only because he cites far more credible sources, such as left-wing bloggers who would know far more about the subject than Jewish news sites located 10 feet from exploding rockets or the Washington Times. Plus, there's that half a brain thing to consider.
But A'NedInAJed has nothing to worry about. In addition to the MSM, DNP, BBC and LSD, he's got Kofi A'Con and the U.N. on his side so he must be right.
Thank Gaia, Kofi sees the blatant violations of "humanitarian law" that Israel committed for no good reason at all. Kofi gets it. He knows that Hezbollah was innocently building sandcastles on the playgrounds of the schools for underprivileged Christians in southern Lebanon when the bloodthirsty Zionists struck.
-----------------------
By NICK WADHAMS
Associated Press Writer
UNITED NATIONS
Israel's air raid on in the Lebanese town of Qana, which killed 28 people, may be part of a larger pattern of violations of international law in the war between Israel and Hezbollah, U.N. Secretary-General Kofi Annan said in a report Monday.
In that light, Annan said that the July 30 attack was sufficiently serious to merit a more comprehensive investigation.
The attack should be seen "in the broader context of what could be, based on preliminary information available to the United Nations ... a pattern of violations of international law, including international humanitarian law and international human rights law committed during the course of the current hostilities," Annan wrote.
Posted by: The Exorcist | August 12, 2006 at 04:12 PM
Finally will some one tell me? Is the Islamic wave of "terror" the righteous wrath of the oppressed indigenous peoples of the Earth directed at Bush & Blair for their numerous crimes of capitalism or is it just a phony scheme to keep the ignorant (non progressive) masses voting for them?
I heard Ahmeddinnerjacket and Mike Wallace had a good chuckle over Bush's poll numbers. Of course, Ahmeddinnerjacket's poll numbers are always wonderful (or else).
Posted by: Justa Joe | August 12, 2006 at 04:58 PM
OHMYGoddess. That lady in the 4-wheel scooter is me grandma and she doesn't do anything worse then run a little cocaine now and then. She was FORCED into that by Boooosh, who took away her aid to families with dependent children just because she doesn't happen to have any. Except me and I'm 45.
Then Boooosh/Haliburton/Cheney/Enron raised electric rates so she can hardly keep her scooter charged.
Vote Democratic in November! Or December, or whenever it is. I kinda forget...
Posted by: DonkeyDick | August 12, 2006 at 05:58 PM
Larry, there is a special room in the dhimmi hall of fame for you when I make my appearance. Unfortunately allah (pbuh) has not told me yet when that will be. I believe I like this speaking "truth to power" you people, excuse me, you second class trash speak. 36 virgins for all of you should you decide to martyer yourselves in the service of allah (pbuh).
Posted by: Imam Mehdi | August 12, 2006 at 07:30 PM
This latest "terror scare" is all part of Butthead-Bu$h's plot to head-butt the bill of rights. Think about it, who does this ban on liquids in the cabin impact? The working class trying to bring a little liquid refreshment, beer, on-board to help ease the pain of TSA sanctioned gate rape. Plutocrats in first class get all the free drinks they want. Regular folks are denied their Constitutional right to beer and have to line the pockets of the rich by paying inflated airline prices for en route beer.
Friends don't take my word for it, connect the dots. Who is the biggest beer manufacturer, Budweiser. Who owns it, Adolph Busch. Combine that with Bush Hitler, what do you get? Adolph Hitler Busch Bush. What could be more clear-cut, as in clear cutting old growth forests?
We need to get the Bu$h crime family out of power and into prison faster than a Katrina refugee running to a liquor store with a FEMA debit card.
Posted by: RWing Nut | August 13, 2006 at 10:20 AM
"Adolph Hitler Busch Bush."
Sometymes, we Lyberals, I mean, Progressyves, just can't see the once-lush forest that has been raped and pillaged and torn down by HitlerBurton for the trees.
Pure genius at connecting the dots.
Posted by: Bush4Ever | August 13, 2006 at 04:14 PM
Well, what about PeaceMotherSheehan's dehydration the VERY DAY that Bush banned personal care products?
Coinydink? I think not. One other astute progressyve here connected those dots and I am so proud of hym/her/it. As for that chubby-cheeked BuschYouth in training, is there no shame to the levels this man will stoop to get the young of our country? Next thing you know he will be lobbing missiles at the freedom fighters of the Hexballsoff. Just as brainwashed as they are but smarter and better smelling.
Posted by: PTPFP | August 14, 2006 at 04:23 AM
You may have competition, Larry.
Posted by: Che | August 14, 2006 at 05:11 AM
One question always springs to mind when I see a photo of Mike Wallace's new pal Ahmadinejad. Do they still have Robert Hall stores in Iran?
Posted by: ponytailed guy | August 14, 2006 at 06:06 AM
Excorcist: I took your quiz and scored a '72'! I passed! Praise Gaia!
You really tripped me up on the last question... I thought for sure Hall and Oates were subway explosive and detonation experts before they were famous for pointing out the dangers of the "Maneater."
Posted by: Wilderness Fox | August 14, 2006 at 07:10 AM
Amenijihad haad a poor upbringing, so that is his excuse for jihad? Doesn't he know that unless he lives here next door to Oliver Willis that he was in the lap of luxury!
This morning on NPR news, the Chicago Times Havana Bureau Chief was absolutley lyrical over Papa Fidel's recovery and his family snaps with Hugo Chavez (Cyndy Sheehan's boyfriend), his spirit guide and Raoul 'whatshisname.'
His voyce dryppyng wyth emotion, he tearfully vocalized his happiness over these high quality, outstanding photos of Papa that appeared in the local news and breathlessly reminded us that even though he wouldn't be back to his full health, he was nonetheless on the mend.
*sob*
I cried too.
Posted by: PTPFP | August 14, 2006 at 07:44 AM