Light Blogging

It’s finals time again at Evergreen State College, so blogging has been and will continue to be light. As a Professym of Midget Studies and the Kama Sutra, I’ve been terribly busy all week giving my students their quarterly exams. Trying to get their tiny feet up into the stirrups is no easy task, let me tell you. One would think that the little tykes would be a tad more flexible, what with the stretching exercises we've been doing all year. But apparently some individuals would rather party through the whole semester than do their assigned homework. Such disregard for the value of higher education is becoming increasingly typical of each generation of little people that I teach. Sometimes I wonder if there is any hope for midgetkind at all.

Comments

[bigMac]

Larry, what are u lerning these youngins? Midget studes and the Kuma Sutra...hmmm...Topics like the study of the brain of KKKBush and the many ways that he and KKKRove and Haliburton Cheney are screwing us?

[nk]

There was a midget down in Texas whose testicles ached almost all the time. The midget went to the doctor and told him what the problem was. The doctor told him to drop his pants and he would have a look. The midget dropped his pants. The doctor stood him up onto the examining table, and started to examine him. The doc put one finger under his left one and told the midget to turn his head and cough-the usual method to check for a hernia. "Aha!" mumbled the doc and putting his finger under the right one, he asked the midget to cough again. "Aha!" said the doctor and reached for his surgical scissors. Snip, snip, snip, snip on the right side then snip, snip, snip, snip, snip, snip, snip on the left side. The midget was so scared he was afraid to look, but noted with amazement that the snipping did not hurt. The doctor then told the midget to get dressed and see if they still ached. The midget was absolutely delighted as he walked around the doc's office and discovered his groin area was no longer aching. The midget replied,"Perfect Doc, and I didn't even feel it... What did you do?" The Doctor replied, " I cut two inches off the top of your cowboy boots."

[aelfheld]

Doesn't the saddle chafe?

[Dork]

Gay midget transgendered cowboys. Take that George Bush!

[Sen. Durbin]

Larry, don't you know that homeworKKK is just a way for the reich-wingers to infect our precious children with the terminal disease of "personal responsibility?" If all students did their studies, then who would be on next generation's welfare rolls? I would have no more poor people to buy votes from...er, I mean, help.

[Dodger]

In light of Larry's absence, I think we should just surrender in Iraq.

[camojack]

So, now we're blogging about lights?

How 'bout a thousand points of 'em?!

[libmeister]

Our mentor and savior Mother Sheehan has been arrested again!

And see how the reich-wing media attempts to minimize her great anti-war movement by claiming only a few dozen anti-war progressyves were protesting with her. We all know there had to have been at least ten thousand anti-war rioters there. Once again we are treated to a conspiracy of silence! IS THERE NO JUSTICE?

[Bush4Ever]

I have an idea for a bumpersticker: "My Chyld Ys A Chyld Of Presence, At Least 25% Of The Tyme, At (SCHOOL NAME)"

What do you think?

[Moonchild]

Lar, don't push your students too hard. They are just awakening to the garden of ideas, and forcing them to pull weeds at this early stage will cause them to rebel in later years.

Just look at me. Nazi math professors pushed me so hard that I don't like to balance my checkbook anymore, and I become angry when customers demand 'their change' when I work the drive-thru window. Fraulein Braun in my home economics class angered me so much that I still refuse to bathe as my form of humble protest.

[Che]

How about we pitch in and get a bumper sticker for Larry, "My Midgets Combined to be Student of the Month for February at Evergreen State College"

[libmeister]

Damn that Bu$Hitler! He's gone and killed superman's wife!

We must surrender in Iraq before Shrubya puts a hit on every progressyve in Hollyweird.

[OmarTheTentMaker]

Damn that Bu$Hitler! He's gone and killed superman's wife!

He's going to get all of us sooner or later!!!!!

[Bush4Ever]

"Damn that Bu$Hitler! He's gone and killed superman's wife!"

He also got Kirby Puckett who he thought was in New Orleans. When Der ChimpenReichsFuhrer found out he had missed Kirby...the word went out.

[dave]

I've seen a midget naked before lar....It's sort of Gaia's own practical joke. (Big things come in small packages)

[Neocon-pincher]

Larry: The next time you have one of your little people in the stirrups for an exam, you could poke them in the butt with a tablespoon. That way you get midget fidgets, which is really fun to say.

[Arbiter]

Bu$Hitler has been secretly cloning a super race of Oompa Loompas in his mad quest to take over the world! Larry, please check your "midgets" to make sure they're not spies!!!

[Christopher Taylor]

How on earth can you stomach going to Evergreen? I'd snap like a postal worker after a few weeks of the fellow students, heaving unwashed she-beasts and insane leninist professors.

And remember: the lesson of Hurricane Katrina is not that Bush hates blacks, it is that Bush hates Jazz.

[Bush4Ever]

Helloooo!!! Dial 1-800-GET-A-LIFE

Professym Chomstein, have your vertically-challenged students check this guy out!! Please, all my Enlyghtened Lyberal, I mean, Progressyve Brethryn, Systeryn, and Othyrs, check it out too. I wonder if this guy thought this dreck up while churning the butter or maybe riding to town to the General Store for some salt to preserve his food?

[Fallyc Symbyl]

Hey, Larry, where do you find stirrups in that small size? Ebay?

As a follower of Mohammed (May his name be praised forever.), I have followed in his footsteps and garnered a number of 9-year-old concubines (May this religious right be enjoyed by me forever.).

I wish I could marry them, like my inspiration (may my stamina last at least another year.). But, you know how it is. Those conservatives won't let us get married to our fellow same-sex lovers, our pet sheep, nor our multiple 9 year girlfriends. Damn fascists!

[Neocon-pincher]

Bu$hitler made me forget that it was the Professym!

That neo-facist minister! Glorifying those rich white males at the Alamo who tried to overthrow the government, thereby becoming traitors! Dying for principles -- Puuuullleeeease! They just wanted to kill Hispanic people and, through their own hubris were surrounded and destroyed by the very people they considered genetically inferior to themselves. That's not bravery. That's poetic justice! Unfortunately, Sam Houston wanted kickbacks from Helliburton for the oil rich lands and eventually subverted and overthrew the otherwise peaceful owners of the land. Such a tragedy! Once governed by multi-cultural progressyves like Emporer Maximilion, Texas became a land of white male ReTHUGliKKKans in big silly hats!

That preaching facist has me so upset, I need some gensing tea and my CD of Mother Sheehan singing John Lennon classics.

[Arbiter]

I'm never visiting Texas again! (unless I'm protesting the Chimp at Camp Sheehan). Oprah was right, hamburger and steaks are the debil!! Tofu burgers are way more delicous! The God of the Christians may think it's okay to torture animals like Bush's Abu Gharib Gitmo, but my Gaia says to love every creature. I'm not even going to mow my lawn anymore. Poor blades of grass, I am so sorry for hurting you... Damn, I need another hit...

[OmarTheTentMaker]

Larry-Do you have a Mini ME?

[Bush4Ever]

Reading all these missives that SPEAK TRUTH TO POWER is just too much for me to...for me to...

HEY HEY!! HO HO!!
CHIMPY'S GOT TO GO!!!

HO HO!! HEY HEY!!
IMPEACH BU$HITLER TODAY!!!

Whew!! I still have to wait an hour or so until I can get some Green Herbal Bubble Tea so that helped a...

WHAT DO WE WANT?
JUSTICE!!!

WHEN DO WE WANT IT?
NOW!!!

Alright, alright, okay, okay...that should be it.

[OmarTheTentMaker]

Didn't they kill you at Kent State?