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Dodger

Is their no end to his evil? He MUST be defeated in the next election! I don't think the humyn race can take another four years of this, this, SHRUB. Not to mention all the other furry creatures.

RoCkY mTnagin. Lioness

New age of Darkness? Does this mean not only N.O, but the world will be one big chocolate city???

Sen. Durbin

If Bu$h is all of a sudden against oil consumption, then oil must actually be a good thing. Given that support from Der Chimpenfuhrer is the ultimate indication of an idea's wrongheadedness and pure evil, I believe that oil conservation must therefore be terrible. As progressyves, we now support oil consumption; we have always supported oil consumption.

Menstrual Rainbow

"isn’t that like letting your local crack dealer run the rehab clinic?"

This is surprisingly intolerant for you Larry. You'll be arguing that members of Nambla shouldn't be allowed to run Kindergartens next. Who would be better to run a rehab clinic than someone who knows how to meet the needs of addicts?

camojack

As a caver (that's a spelunker, to the uninitiated) I kind of like the darkness...

Fallyc Symbyl

Ted Kennedy's days of nude sunbathing will be over.

I don't know, Larry. I am just as Progressyve as the next persyn. But, I am afraid I would follow any leader to get Sir Ted to stop his nude sunbathing, even the chimpmeister.

Has the enemy found our weak spot?

Gaia help me!

Fist of Etiquette

Bush is speaking out against big oil, and he is looking to hand over control of our ports to Iraqi freedom fighters (the latter move endorced by President James Carter, I might add).

I think what we're seeing here is a puppetmaster that has been weakened by his latest, biggest scandal (namely a drunken shooting spree) and the puppet is breaking free and doing his own thing.

Maybe, just maybe, Bush is more liberal than you think.

Moonchild

Whenever a chimp gets a little too far from his master, the master will snap the leash and re-establish who's boss. So, while Cheney's off exploiting the gun show loophole to buy a bigger shotgun and depleted uranium buckshot to finish the job on his 'hunting buddy', Chimp is dancing around, picking at the head lice on war protesters, and begging his intellectual superiors for peanuts. 'Both Barrels' Cheney will return soon, but for now, it's interesting to watch.

OmarTheTentMaker

Bu$h's plan has more holes than Chin's in a Chinese Phone Book. I'm not sure I can wait around to see his plan....I'm sooooo scared. Where will I get GA$ for my SUV? Will I need to sell a kidney so I can buy solar panels for my roof? Damn that BU$H!!!!! YOU NAZI CHIMP!!!

OmarTheTentMaker

Now Bush wants to put O.B.L. in charge of security for our nations ports. The CHIMP MUST GO!!!

Bush4Ever

No War For Sunshine!!

libmeister

Just so long there are alchemical means to create tinfoil we progressyves will survive the McChimpy Bushalliburton induced Dark Ages. Praise Gaia!

libmeister

BTW, I'm really conflicted. Both the Chimperor and Nobel Prize winner Jimmah Carter are FOR turning our ports over to Al Qaeda.

Now Jimmah is a real progressyve who does a far better job of critizing Shrubya than anyone else ... as well as bend nails. But didn't Jimmah also give nuclear reactors to the North Koreans? I'm afraid tinfoil is not even going to straighten this mess out in my mind.

Che

That stoopid evil genius! Whooda thunk that a man who struggled with the chyldryns book "My Pet Goat's Two Mommies" could corner the sunshine market right under our noses. Here's the framework of his diabolical scheme:

1: Kill the peace-loving dinosaurs through old-growth deforestation.

2: Turn the noble reptiles into greenhouse gasses inside little internal combustion furnaces, thus creating a worldwide Guantanamo for the sun's rays.

3: Steal Florida, the "Sunshine State"

4: Eliminate the ozone layer by refusing to sign kyoto, thus allowing more sunshine to reach the earth.

5: Stage 9/11 as a justification to invade Iraq under the guise of stealing their oil, when in fact he wanted their sunshine.

6: Allow unrestricted immigration from the southern border.

7: Sell our ports to the UAE, who have shown their willing complicity to Dumbya's eeeeevil plots.

Bush rushed headlong into war with Iraq to steal there sunshine, not their oil! That sunshine will be brought into the US by way of UAE/Helliburton shipping companies, and processed by inexpensive, non-union immigrants used to working in sunny environments.

How long will it take until, angry that Shrub stole their resources, mocked their no-no-places, and flushed their Qurans, the peace-loving freedom fighters sneak an unaccounted-for "little ball of sunshine" into the ports and level one of our major cities?

Che

Damn it! Boosh made me use the wrong form of "there", knowing that was one of my biggest pet peeves. Is there no limit to his unadultified evilicity?

Bush rushed headlong into war with Iraq to steal their sunshine...

Bush4Ever

It Has Started!!!

Ohio State University to Close Its Primate Center, Retire Its Chimpanzees
COLUMBUS, Ohio, Feb. 21 (AScribe Newswire) -- Ohio State University officials have decided to close its long-standing chimpanzee research center and retire those primates to an animal refuge in Texas.

The nine chimps currently housed at the center will be moved to the San Antonio refuge where they will live out the remainder of their lives. No research is allowed on animals kept at the refuge.

The decision, announced today, is the culmination of a nearly four-year effort to find a new home for the animals.

In recent years, research institutions across the country - including the Air Force, the National Institutes of Health and the National Aeronautics and Space Administration - have elected to reduce the amount of primate research they conduct and retire many of their animals. That has made locating an appropriate long-term home for the animals a more difficult task for Ohio State.

"While we are rightfully proud of the outstanding research that has evolved from Ohio State's primate cognition project in the last decade or so, we believe the time is now right to move the animals to safer quarters where they can live out their lives in peace," explained Robert McGrath, senior vice president for research at the university.

Two earlier agreements with other refuges have fallen through during the last two years. Under an agreement with this third refuge, Primarily Primates, Inc., the animals will be transported by truck to the Texas facility where a new permanent facility is being built for them.

Ohio State is paying for construction of that facility, for medical exams and shipping, and providing an endowment to support the animals.

Costs for the transfer of the animals will be covered by the university's Office of Research and are expected to total approximately $324,000. Previously, the cost of operating the OSU chimp center has reached nearly $200,000 annually.

The current chimp facility, located off Godown Road north of campus, was last refurbished in 1991 when the university housed only five animals in the building. Since then, the total chimp population has risen to nine animals, most of which are either adult or nearing adolescence.

The current population, five males and four females, ranges in age from five to 47 years old. Chimpanzees can reach 65 to 70 years old in captivity.

"At one point, we considered dividing the colony and shipping the older animals to the refuge but experts have advised seriously against dividing such a long-standing colony," McGrath said. "We believe it is best for the animals' welfare to keep them together as a single social group."

Responsibility for the operation of the chimp center now reverts to William Yonushonis, director of the Office of Laboratory Animal Resources and the university's senior laboratory animal care veterinarian. Yonushonis and a nationally-recognized primate specialist toured the Primarily Primates, Inc., facility last fall in anticipation of this move.

Under an agreement with Primarily Primates, Inc., the animals will live out their normal lives in a spacious, free-roaming environment.

Primarily Primates is a well-respected animal sanctuary located north of San Antonio in the Texas Hill Country. Among the approximately 700 primates now living at the facility are approximately 70 chimpanzees.

The temperate climate in the area allows animals to use combined indoor-outdoor housing facilities offering a more natural free-roaming environment.

"This sanctuary is one of the best in the country for chimpanzees and offers these animals a much better environment than we are able to provide at this time. The staff there is well-respected nationally and completely dedicated to the health and well-being of the animals in their care," Yonushonis said.

Along with the overcrowding posed by the current facility, McGrath also cited safety concerns as another reason for retiring the chimps.

These animals are, pound-for-pound, five times stronger than humans and pose formidable challenges when agitated. Moreover, overpopulation at the facility can increase stress within the colony itself leading to attacks by one animal on another.

McGrath acknowledged that a recent incident where a student worker was bitten by one of the chimps underscored existing concerns about the safety of the colony and those working there but he emphasized that the incident wasn't the reason for closing the facility. An investigation into the specifics of that episode is ongoing.

"We have had an agreement with the project's director, Professor Sally Boysen, since 2002 that if adequate new research funding was not obtained to support the colony, then the university would seek to move the animals to an appropriate refuge," he said. "We have delayed that move for nearly two additional years to allow for the researchers' efforts to secure such support."

University officials noted that in recent years, research funding for primate research across the country has been shrinking and that university-based primate colonies are becoming harder to support. Since the 2002 agreement, nine research proposals were submitted by the researchers to traditional funding agencies but all failed to win support.

Over the past two decades, Ohio State studies with the chimps have netted remarkable discoveries. One project recognized the animals' ability to perform rudimentary addition and subtraction while another showed the animals' capacity for altruism, a trait long thought to be only human.

Still another project showed the animals' ability to link symbols and models to everyday tasks, while even more recent work suggested the animals may be capable of the simplest form of reading.

McGrath said that the university would work with Professor Boysen to help her continue her research with animals off the OSU campus.


Arbiter

KKKarl Rove, Dick Cheney (whose daughter is a lesbian) and Haliburton are behind this!!

nk

Who has the largest reserves of sunshine? Saudi Arabia, of course. It's one big solar panel. And I bet that Halliburton has already snapped up all the sweetheart contracts to buy cheap Arabian sunshine and sell it to us at 1000% markup.

nk

We cannot let this travesty transpire. "No Blood for Sunshine."

Arbiter

Good points nk!! I've always wondered why they're called "Sunni" Arabs!! More like "Sunny Arabs!!!!"

aelfheld
[...] screwing their neighbors for an extra buck [...]
You've got it all wrong; the extra buck is for the paper sack.
dave

Great post lar. I've been singing " ain't no sunshine since clinton's gone" all day. and with keeping with my wordsmithing, here's a poem.

GAIA WEEPS
I give you life
Feel the heat of my sun
on your face, my child.

Why must you hurt me?
Driving your SUV's
mining my coal.
making war to steal my oil.
chop my trees
I am raped each day you live in me

I have sent such leaders/teachers
to you.
Albert Gore.
Laurie David.
Why don't you listen?
Why don't you harken unto them?
they fly in their jets to warn
you of my anger.

AmeriKKKa your ass is mine.....

Neocon-pincher

Boy!

Sorry ... I mean ... Person!

Those free thinking lyberal ... I mean, Progressyves at the Seattle PI are brilliant. If we just tax the living F#%& out of them, it will ease the burden on the commuters. Amazing. When you see true brilliance like that, you just want to smack yourself in the head for not seeing it before! Gaia be praised.

OmarTheTentMaker

SUNNY ARABS-I love it. I can't wait for the 2007 Haj in DC. If we plan carefully, we can make sure it happens around the same time as the "Million Man March" ALLAH Akbar

Bush4Ever

"Sorry ... I mean ... Person!"

I believe you meant "Persyn"?

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