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I think what the United States is missing is a city with a culture based off of old "Blacksploitation" films. Black Orleans.

Sen. Durbin

If God is truly a progressyve, then surely He would have sent Hurricane Katrina directly to Enron headquarters, where Bu$h and his KKKronies plotted to steal the stock money of so many hardworking employees..... at least, that's what I thought before my last few bong hits, after which I discovered that the Almighty sent the hurricane to New Orleans in order to highlight the incompetence and racism of Adolf Bush and his administration. In order to complete God's mission, we must impeach the Chimp immediately.


Darryl Dawkins Chocolate Thunder City!


They say God works in mysterious takin' it out on "Nawlins", instead of going to the source.


I don't see what's so mysterious about it. Death With Dignity is one of the highest honors in our nation and God very specifically bestowed it on some of our best and brightest. Besides, Bush was going to kill them anyways. At least God did it the moral and ethical way; through drowning, suicide, being shot, etc.

Kiki B.

Dork, good suggestion for a name for New New Orleans...Black Orleans.

Black Orleans...We will rebuild our city. Then, due to our natural, inborn tendencies to anger and violence(Libs. will say we're poor and black), we will redestroy it in 3 days.

Kiki B.

P.S. That God controlled by Shrub ain't got nothin' on us po', black folks(the regional colloquialism would be Niggah).

Fist of Etiquette

God (through Nagin) apologized for those remarks.


Y'all crakahz is crazy!


Don't be so hard on Ray Nagin. Nawlins should remain a chocolate city---who the hell wants it anymore?


See, you knuckledragging religious KKKonservatives. It wasn't a matter of God not being on the side of atheist/seculars/progressyves, it was just a matter of us finding our political voice to begin invoking God's judgment upon eeeeeeevil AmeriKKKa. Pat Robertson has nothing on our Ray Nagin!


Just heard a progressyve black caller on that reich-wing radio talk show, Rush Wimpbaugh, giving the host a good ol' progressyve one-two. The caller said if Jesus was alive today "Jesus would be a liberal."

How profound, I thought to myself. He's right. Jesus would be for the aborting of babies, encouraging men to plunge their pro-creative parts in the anal cavity of another man, would desire for little Jimmy to have two mommies, be on the side of Muslim freedom fighters and would oppose any duly elected government in using the sword against criminals, terrorists, and troubling anarchists. I mean, Jesus was really nothing more than a dope smoking proto-hippy! Now where's that bong?


Frankly, God is going to need to step up a little more than reaching out to the black community and anointing Naigin as her spokespersyn. She has a record of judgementalism which stretches from Sodom to Gomorrah and all the way to Jericho. She'll also need to move into the mainstream on abortion.

If she'll do that and renounce her elitist position on being the Alpha and Omega, the creator of all things and acknowledge Ms. Rodham as the DNC's personal savior, we can begin negotiations about her non-progressyve tithing scheme.

The Den Mother

Thank you, Moonchild, for being the first to speak truth to power, i.e. that we need to be veeeerrrrrry skeptical of this "God" (I prefer the gender-neutral "Godde") that has chosen to manifest her/him/itself to His Honor the Mayor in his hour of turmoil. How do we know it was truly a benevolent, progressyve, secular Godde who spoke to Ray? Don't forget that KKKarl Rove continues, even as we type, to tinker with his evil mind control apparatuses (apparati?). That, and Bu$h just made me lose a contact lens, damn that shrub.


Of course Jesus was a lybyryl!

His mother had never lain with a man.

His stepfather mounted an ass right before his birth.

He received government subsidies from the three kings from the moment he was born.

He avoided military service.

Recent documents suggest that, while working in construction, he helped found the Local Carpenter's Union after his L&I claims were refused on the grounds that he could just lay hands on himself and be healed.(Side note: The fact that Jesus worked in construction does not mean he would have driven an SUV or pickup. A sheet of 5/8" sheetrock can be carried quite comfortable on top of a Prius at slow speeds. Contractors are expected to be late, anyway.)

He was black like the Clintons.

He was Jewish (But not a Zionist, mind you.) like Babs.

The Jooooos conspired against Him, just like Al Sharpton.

When His friends got the munchies, He was able to turn bread and fish into nachos.

He protected wildlife and healed the leopards, just like Al Gore.

Like Ted Kennedy, He was pulled off amazing feats to avoid drowning.

He made the crippled walk, just like John Kerry.


Did the Holy Mayor mention anything about Godde coming back to get us and bring us all to planet Funkotron?

I am folding my black sweat outfit and brand new Nikes as I type this!


God actually came to me in a dream last night and instructed me to tell you that what he really wants is a chocolate plantation.

In this manner, democrats in the house and senate can labor in the fields to make all of the chocolate required to rebuild New Orleans. Once a proper Chocolate New Orleans is built, God will then return to earth for judgment day, raising all of those who are tolerant, non-judgmental, and multicultural with his right hand and damning all of the oil loving, imperialist, republiKKKan thugs with his left.


Damn that Bu$h!!!! Do you think those Goose-Stepping Nazi Police will continue beating drunks in full view of the media?

Wilderness Fox

Che: I borrowed your wisdom for a thread on my blog. In light of monetary royalties to you, I have made a donation to the Mayor Nagin New Orleans Chocolate Fund for a darker (and thus better) New Orleans.

Remember: The blacker the berry, the sweeter the juice (and the more oppression you have experienced by the Evil White Slave Masters; thus, a bigger payout once reparations are finalized).

Red Loser

This is the funniest post in recent memory. And that's saying a lot.


So now it's ok for progressyves to start invoking God again?

This really pisses me off!

It's taken me 5 years and $50,000 worth of Scientology counseling to deprogram all the catholic bullshit that was crammed into my brain (and my other orifices as well, if my recovered memory and lawsuit against Cardinal Mahoney are successful.)

And can somebody please tell me what I'm supposed to do with my velvet Gaia painting?


Does it count if the Hershey company is considering opening up a "chocolate" factory in New Orleans?

Mayor Nagin should step down and let the REAL Mayor of New Orleans shine:

Willy Wonka!


Lib Larry:

It's a good thing that Ray Nagin didn't call for New Orleans to become a "Vanilla New Orleans"...

...that would be racist.



Are you saying God is a switch-hitter?


What up dog?

I picked up a bible the other day.( I'm glad that us libs like god now, My eyes used to burn and I would throw up when I used to see a bible)

This is what I found just looking in it...

The right to an abortion on demand.
The right to always have a dem in the white house.
The right to FREE health care.

That jesus guy ran the rethugs/nazis out of the temple.

That the jews were trouble makers from way back.

That one day, jesus will judge the bushalburtion war machine and cast him and his menions into hell.

peace out, dave

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