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spd rdr

I don't know. Television cameras and live feeds seem awfully intrusive to me. Maybe we could just pigeons with return receipt requested tags?

brainsample

So when do we get the videos of Iranian coeds shaving each other's backs?

And what do they use? Sheep shears?

Friend of USA

I went to pee, and when I came back another larry's post appeared...

Groovy!

Friend of USA

"...he'd offer Iran a nuclear olive branch"

You know, those olives would really make cool glow in the dark drinks, without the use of black lights.

JannyMae

I don't know, maybe it's the mood I'm in right now, or the f&*%ing MIGRAINE I'm fighting, but this idea sounds an awful lot like something that Howie would come up with!

***eerie organ music playing***

Hmm, it appears I may be in, "The Twilight Zone."

Friend of USA

Janny,

Have you tried tylenol with codeine?( don't know in the US, but available over the counter in Canada )

Or fiorinal?( my favorite, requires a prescription, and you need a stronger dose with time )

If you take aspirin, some say crushing it first and diluting it in a glass of juice is easier on the stomach.

Take your migraine medication with a couple of hot coffees; Coffee actually makes your system absorb medication faster.

Or take your migraine medication with anti-nausea medication ( if you also have nausea, your stomach won't try to..well..push them out; my doctor gave me that trick )

A warm ( I don't know what you call those flat rubber bottles )on your stomach and at the same time a very cold wet towel on your closed eyes laying down in a quiet room( with your kid, might not be always easy ) or with your soft favorite music.

Minty massage oil on the forehead and temples?

A foot massage? ( requires a willing partner...not always available on demand, I know )

A long shower with the water massaging your head or neck with little light or candles
( carefull some odors can trigger headaches )

You probably already know about MSG, but did you know that vanillin causes migraines just like MSG? ( vanilin - often called vanilla extract - is in fact artificial vanilla and is in almost every thing sweet or chocolaty; cookies, pudding, candies, even in Nutella! read labels! )

...

You've guessed it, I've been a life long headache and migraine sufferer.
Actually I've had a medium
( medium pain ) migraine since tuesday evening, and I am now full of caffeein and can't sleep.( it's past one in the morning here )

Hope I could help you...

And, sorry Larry for using all this space but Bush caused our migraines, I just know it!

camojack

I'm wondering, while the Iranians are playing with nuclear materials, if there might not be some kind of "accident" there...

Moonchild

And I thought this site was progressyve.

In the midst of an Neville Chamberlain/Jimmy Carter quality diplomatic solution, Lar throws in a crude, fetishistic sexual bargaining chip which would exploit the womyn of Iran for no other reason than to arouse the phallogemeony of West. The sacred ritual of young women exploring their sexuality via shaving cream, razors, and back hair is not something to be soiled by the leers of dygusting male eyes. To cheapen that passage into womynhood is worse than not giving Iran plans for our W-88 warheads along with the tritium to make them, assuming they don't already have the plans since Clinton gave them to China in 1996 in a masterstroke of nuclear diplomacy.

For shame Larry. When you're stabbing your thigh with a fork under the sink tonight, I demand that you jab extra hard in penance for your hate-crimes against womyn.

Jeremy

Well said, Moonchyld!

"If any weapons are moved or launched, an alert U.N. could then quickly draft a resolution of condemnation, and provide Iran with updated mailing addresses for the bribes."
Doesn't the U.N. have email! Oh no, that's right, BushchimpHitler wants to keep the Internet in Amerikkka only!

aelfheld

The only problem I can see with Larry's desire to share some of our nuclear warheads with the Iranians is how to get the warheads to the Iranians with enough speed to demonstrate our seriousness.

I'd recommend using MX: it's a guaranteed delivery service with a phenomenal track record of being on time and accurate, and there should be no problem with border crossings or red tape.

JannyMae

Thread hijack alert!

Migraines, I have been experiencing for several years. Thankfully, I don't get them very often anymore. Thanks for your advice and well-wishes, F of USA, but I had already taken an antihistamine (benadryl) with tylenol, for the nausea and had followed it up with enteric-coated aspirin when I got the headache anyway (sometimes if I take it soon enough, I can avoid the worst of the headache). I would say it's been probably six months since I got a migraine, but this one was a bear, but only for about an hour until the aspirin kicked in.

I have had them where they last for DAYS, with the pain medication only helping them to back off a little. I sure hope you got rid of yours!

Che Guevarito

I recommend that we allow Jimmy Carter to escort aelfheld's MX missiles. After all, it was Carter's passivity that enabled the Iranian liberation of the American Embassy in Tehran. It stands to reason that he should witness, first-hand, Persian society's transformation into a safer, more peaceful place.

Friend of USA

I'm better today, thanks.

I wish Halliburton and the military complex could develop a ray gun that gives migraines to middle eastern meanies.

Then we could sell them norh american made medications!

dave

Larry, you are on to something. not only we should give iran the nukes we should show them how well they work..(no, you supid neo-cons not on them)we should use them on the REAL force of evil in the world...ISRAEL!!!!! Now before some repug nazi type calls me a jew-hater,(I'm a lib and I can not hate in the least) For the record I support all the good, noble, smart jews that live in the US and vote dem.. The one's I don't care for are the zionist- this-land -is -ours- because- god -said-so-and -we- run/own-every-thing types. This would be the real final solution to that jewish problem. And just think about how this act would put us back in the good graces of europe and the arab nations as well. we could kill to birds with one stone.(or nukes in this case)

Che Guevarito

Janny,

Why would a discussian about Iranian nucyular weapons turn into talk about hijacking or any other act of terrorism?

Mrs. Che also gets migranes quite often. A good dose of quityerbitchin and wheresmydamndinner seems to help. It helps me, anyway.

She actually imports (keisters) headache medicine from Holland to help with them. It's nothing exotic or narcotic. It's just super-duper aspirin with caffiene.

pat wilson

The recent troubles of the Russian navy was the subject of a conversation at my favorite neo-con watering hole, the Insensitive Neanderthal, on South Congress (SoCo to the cool hep cats) a couple of nights ago. Karl wondered why the Russian navy, until recently such a mighty force to be reckoned with, is now unable to unsnag its own subs in just 600 feet of water. "Unless I'm wrong, free divers go that deep." he said. "The Russians have to have the enemy to come and rescue them. The Big Red Machine is now just a floating bucket of bolts where the officers are frequently drunk, sailors go unpaid for a year at a time and cruel hazing sends raw recruits to hospitals routinely. Not so long ago, the top of the line Russian attack submarine shot itself in the crankshaft with a torpedo killing 120 sailors. The torpedoes were ancient in the first place, and hadn’t been rotated out of the tubes for maintenance since they were loaded. The electronics were rusted and faulty. And this is the best they had."

Johnny B chimed in. “It’s not just the Russian Bear whose muzzle is greying . It’s all of Europe with the particular exception of Great Britain. The best French soldiers are foreigners. The Dutch Marines are a joke. You can see them lolling around the beaches of Curacao and Aruba taking smoke breaks while playing beach volleyball in their speedos like a bunch of homosexualists. The Spanish and Italians? Please. Empty uniforms. The European Armies for the most part are now just generals, admirals and bands.”

“Ya know why this is?” asked Dick, rhetorically. "There’s a reason they're not funding the support functions--modern warfare doesn't require it to address the threat. The nukes have given them a false sense of security. Why should they go to the trouble and expense of having a standing army? First of all, Uncle Sugar is there for the heavy lifting (and to pump billions into the economies of Britain, Germany, Italy, Spain) and secondly, if they can’t negotiate our way out of trouble, there is always el nuko grande. It takes the worry out of being close. No need to pay for a huge army when ya have nukes to settle any serious dispute.”

“So where does that leave us?” asked Donny. “Isn’t it about time to reevaluate the catalogue and rethink the doctrine? I’ve studied these things. The history of warfare is a history of expensive campaigns that required a commitment to logistics, maintenance and expensive lubrication of the combat trains. It was a complicated, expensive and sophisticated. Did I mention that war is expensive? So how long do we get to go on observing these artificial “rules” which no one else seems to be aware of or care about, while the enemy gets to use a different play book? How long do we go on shouldering the burden of cleaning out the world’s stables using a golden shovel? The primitives don’t have to maintain field hospitals, dust-off choppers, messhalls or a standing million man army. So why do we? Does this make sense?”

“I agree,” said Johnny B. “We need to change the game. It’s time. Instead of making little incremental changes to training and doctrine, we need to make one big one to remind the primitives how the cow ate the cabbage. Forget about a shot clock. Forget about putting in a three point rule. We need to change the shape of the ball and the size of the field. We need to confront the primitives about all these wrongs, slights, injuries and insults they are perpetrating on us. We need to get their attention. We need to nuke the snot out of them. We need to make an announcement that the next outrage that is perpetrated on us will result in the loss of a city to be named later. Tehran maybe. Damascus. Medina.”

Dick knows his history: “The bombs of Hiroshima and Nagasaki played an important part in getting the Japanese to listen to reason. Six weeks earlier in the battle of Okinawa we had lost 12,000 marines and soldiers with three times that many wounded. The Japs lost over a hundred thousand dead. And that was just defending Okinawa, which was really considered a stepchild among islands by the Japanese—different language, different history, inferior people and culture etc. And the Japanese 4th graders on the four main islands were being trained with sharpened sticks to repel the Americans invaders during the expected invasion. So what do ya think happened to put the chill on that fanatic and fundamentalist determination sixty years ago?

“Well, I'll remind ya. Two juicy nukes refreshed the parts of the emperor’s attention that other methods couldn’t reach. Five days later they surrendered. We need to remind the primitives of what is really important--preserving our Judeo-Christian way of life and culture, even if that means wiping out the primitives and theirs."

Don said, “You got it, C-man. “If you’re gonna cock it, ya better throw it.”

Che Guevarito

It's ironic that the culture that introduced the concept of zero to Western civilization may soon demonstrate many new examples of how zero may be used:

Ground zero.
Population zero.
GDP zero.
Temperature 1,(Followed by a bunch of zeros).
Nukes: 0

South of I-10

Yes, we have an excess Nukes here in the US but if we would share them with all the tribal War Chiefs in Afghanistan and Pakistan ( & Northern India), the world could be a safer place. Stir the pot a little and the problem would be self eliminating along with it, we could see if OBL could glow in the dark.

Friend of USA

Che,

that;

"Mrs. Che also gets migranes quite often. A good dose of quityerbitchin and wheresmydamndinner seems to help. It helps me, anyway."

was very funny in itself, but what is also very funny is that, when I read
the word " quityerbitchin ", I'd say that for about a second and a half, I was actually trying to remember if I had heard of that migraine medication before!

Hey! it could have been a new form of quinine...No?

I would call this phenomenom that I was a victim of;

"The second language delay."

You got me Che;
I've not been "punked",
I've been not been "Xed",
I've been "Cheguevaritorized"
( sounds better than I've been "Cheved", doesn't it? )

Joooooooooooooos Newton

re: A good dose of quityerbitchin and wheresmydamndinner seems to help. It helps me, anyway."

FofUSA:

I believe the medication you were thinking of was "heywhydontwehavesexthatalwaysmakesyoufeelbetterhon". That seems to be the one that is currently offered up around my house.

JannyMae

Well, all this nuclear stuff is interesting and all, but in this house, a migraine usually means, "ain'tnodamndinner." Luckily for my progressi-stud, and the boy, my migraine didn't hit until AFTER dinner last night.

Che, your understanding of your wife's problem is touching. I'm sure she appreciates you giving her a dose of that new quinine medication (FofUSA, you crack me up!).

By the way, I've found that caffeine can sometimes BRING ON a migraine. Funny, how after so many years with so many experts studying them, these headaches are still so poorly understood!

JannyMae

I believe the medication you were thinking of was "heywhydontwehavesexthatalwaysmakesyoufeelbetterhon". That seems to be the one that is currently offered up around my house.

So. Do tell. Does it???

Joooooooooooooos Newton

Actually, sometimes it does.

Unfortunately it doesn't last :)

Che Guevarito

Hey! it could have been a new form of quinine...No?

That's a common mistake. There is one striking similarity between the two treatments.

Quinine makes your ears ring (I had malaria abour 5 years ago and was annoyingly deaf during my treatment.) While quityerbitchin itself does not cause ringing in the ears, Mrs. Che's round-house to the side of the head when I administer it does. She also treats me with a medicinal dose of lackanookie.

Joooooooooooooos Newton

lackanookie

Ah. Now that is a tried and true home remedy for many male ailments.

Most efficacious. Works fast, too.

Err...from what I hear.

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