Sen. Boxer Demands Photos of Michael Jackson's Genitals

Fiesty Sen. Barbara Boxer is apparently the only Democrat left in Congress with any balls. While the DINOS were letting fascist judges through like it was going out of style, ol' Bab's threatened to block the confirmation vote for Roose Bolton until confidential photos of Michael Jackson's splotchy penis were forwarded to her office.

"We should delay this until we see that information; it's a matter of right and wrong," Boxer pleaded.

A California superior court judge ruled today against releasing several photos, drawings, and a macaroni-noodle replica of Michael Jacksons genitals, adding to a long list of obstructionist tactics from the Bush administration. Judge Rodney S. Melville was appointed to the bench in 1987 by Gov. George Deukmejian, a Republican who once attended a GOP fundraiser in which Karl Rove was present.

While predictibly dodging responsiblity and denying any connection to Jackson's penis, Bush's mouthpiece, Scott McClellan, made a snide remark in a briefing today that any classified information given to democrat senators on Monday afternoon would be in the New York Times on Tuesday morning.

Yet by stonewalling, the White House is essentially playing right into Bab's hands and delaying Bolton's confirmation vote indefinitely, or at least until Sandy Berger can sneak Michael Jackson's penis out in his trousers. Bolton's pointy elbows, bullying mustache, and gift for making grown men cry like little girls in his presence make him a liability, rather than an asset to our country. As ambassador to the United Nations, Bolton will serve as our representative to the International Community. Do we really want our loving brothers and sisters in the UN to think of America as a no-nonsense tough-guy who doesn't take any shit from anyone?

Of course not. And that's exactly why Bush is afraid to let Michael Jackson's penis stand up to scrutiny.

Comments

[Jeremy]

"...Monday afternoon would be in the New York Times on Monday morning."

lol!

[CKCat]

If she gets the pictures, will Jacko quit grabbing himself---since he'll finally know there's at least something there?

Just don't let MJ have a pic of what's in Boxers boxers!! There'll be a serious case of penis envy going on in Neverland.

[Che Guevarito]

Must...resist...urge...to...degrade...political...discourse. Politics..are...civility. Writing...is...civilized...and...and...and...

I googled Boxer's Briefs for an hour but could not find Jackson's penis anywhere in them.

[camojack]

"...any classified information given to democrat senators on Monday afternoon would be in the New York Times on Monday morning."

Boy, you said a mouthful. Unlike, probably, the topic of your post...
(OUCH! Did I just say that?!)

[Anonymous Person Who is NOT Liberal Larry]

I guess I should probably fix the typos before I crawl under the sink for the night.

[CKCat, P. I.]

If Anonymous Persyn is NOT Liberal Larry, how the helk will he/she, prior to retreating to the "self-medicating cabinet", be able to fix any typo's--should they be found? Hmmm...?? Confessions of a hacker.....or a liar?

[heldmyw]

I understand that Michael says he'll show Babs his penis if she'll show him hers.

[Cricket]

That is Tuesday morning. Michael Jackson's penis stand up to scrutiny? I am wiping my eyes over the prose and feelings of strength assail me.
Che, go over to the Dark Side.

[RWing Nut]

In a related story, Senate Democrats are threating to block confirmation of any nominee to replace alleged terrorist leader Abu Musab al-Zarqawi who fails to express as much hatred for G W Bush as they do. Our confidential source known only as "Bagdad Jim" informs us that any candidate not dedicated to the slaughter of US troops during a Republican administration is an extremist and too far out of the mainstream to be considered. Such a person would be an affront to the comity of the Senate and an insult to George Galloway, he continued.

Reached for comment from an undisclosed cave in Pakistan, al Qaeda leadership responded with a compromise, offering not to nominate anyone with deeply held Christian beliefs except in extraordinary circumstances.

[aelfheld]

Do we really want our loving brothers and sisters in the UN to think of America as a no-nonsense tough-guy who doesn't take any shit from anyone?

Yes.

Especially "our loving brothers and sisters".

[JannyMae]

Liberal Larry. You are obviously reaping the inevitable decrease in I.Q. points rendered from consistently using, "Dumocratic Underground," as an inspiration for your posts. You must emerge from the sink for some fresh air in order to, "clear your head." I'd suggest that yu take another naked romp through Bilgeman's back yard, but he might hit me!

[The Therapist]

I can't believe you got that angle out of the story. . .

Where was my brain?

-T

[CKCat]

Janny Mae. In a manner reminiscent of Gengis Con Kerry, I have a plan. To help you avoid incurring the wrath of Bilgeman, Larry is more than welcome to run around nekkid in MY back yard. [MEOWZA!]--As long as he doesn't mind the occasional raccoon, skunk--- or frequent flyer squirrel! Heck, he might even enjoy their company.

[Cricket]

CKC, you have scared me! The BusHitler conspiracy is proven! Squirrels do his dirty work, and Larry has only uncovered the tip of the acorn in his edgy, hard hitting expose on cat murdering in Wisconsin. Without the pussy posse, Squirrels will be on a rampage! Something must be done! As a Throbbing Sex Kitten, I no longer eat raw squirrel meat. I like mine tenderized with a bit of salt and braised in chicken broth.

[Generic Viagra]

Excellent information about Michael Jackson's Genitals but I don't believe in this post.

[Viagra Pills]

We remember it, and our memories forever, the art just is not forgotten...