British physicist Stephen Hawking has become a Fugitive from Mercy, having escaped through a wormhole as doctors surrounded his Cambridge home. Physicians were summoned Monday evening when his wife remembered that a few years ago, Hawking had asked to be shoved down a flight of stairs if the battery on his electric wheelchair ever ran out. Of course, he denies it in that goofy robot voice of his...but Teresa Heinz-Kerry will tell you that computers can be hacked.
Hawking has suffered from a degenerative muscular disease for 40 agonizing years, and he's never seen a single episode of Queer Eye. It's time to let him go. He led a long, productive life, but now he deserves to Die with Dignity, whether he likes it or not.
Another person added to the long list of post natal abortions. Of course the Rethuglicans will be up in arms about his euthanasia but then they hink fetuses are real babies too.
Bastards.
Posted by: DancesWithBullets | March 22, 2005 at 09:03 AM
Obviously he's been hacked. I was watching an interview with him the other day, and midsentence he would just start talking about herbal Viagra, or how Robert Allen wants morons to become millionaires.
This is really sad since Stephen would be walking right now if only Kerry and Edwards had won. But since Bu$h won't let King County elections officials recount Ohio, Hawking must suffer in his chair.
Still, the Law is the Law. It's time for Stevie to show us his Blue Screen of Death.
Posted by: Che Guevarito | March 22, 2005 at 09:26 AM
Why wasn't this protocol implemented when that stupid deaf bastard Thomas Edison was allowed to roam this world freely; spreading his global warming light bulbs of evil????
Let's move foward democrats with the master race!
Unencumbered by imperfections ;respecting life, liberty,
and the pursuit of happiness.
The final pieces are in place for our Utopia to rise!!!!
Posted by: Nerdwallet | March 22, 2005 at 09:30 AM
Love ya, Larry...Thanks for reminding all the assholes what assholes they are.
Posted by: mrs.r. | March 22, 2005 at 09:34 AM
Oh fine. Listen to Confederate Nazi up there...
"Just becuase she's been in a "persistant vegatative state" for 13 years does not mean we should allow her to starve..."
Hel-looooo! You said it yourself, big guy. That's EXACTLY what you do with plants when you don't want them anymore. You stop watering them!
Do these people ever listen to themselves talk? Rethugs are such morons ...
Posted by: Bush Ate My Soul... | March 22, 2005 at 09:49 AM
Wait... I'm afraid Larry may have fallen into a Rovian trap here. While I'm sure that all progressives agree that people like Professor Hawking must die, maybe that's what Rove wants! After all, if Democrats are calling for people with low quality of life to be killed, they'll use that to go after people with AIDS! (I wish I could claim I figured that out for myself, but in truth I saw it first on DU.)
Posted by: Bubblehead | March 22, 2005 at 09:56 AM
Oh my Goddess, Bubblehead! You're right! And with the Bu$h economy destroying all AmeriKKKans' standard of living, we could all find ourselves on the chopping block!
Oh well. I'm sure the ACLU will fight to save me when my time comes.
Posted by: Che Guevarito | March 22, 2005 at 10:08 AM
DU is a very informative sight that I always turn to when the mainstream media lets me down. For instance, it was the DU forums that first broke the news that it was not a crazed teen who shot up his school in Minnesota yesterday, but someone named "Gun Culture". Folks, if you name your kid "Gun", you're just asking for a shooting rampage.
Posted by: Liberal Larry | March 22, 2005 at 10:11 AM
Surely if Steven Hawking can hang on until 2008 President Edwards can heal him, just like he will heal Christopher Reeve from his recent death. The chimperor apparently can't be bothered to cure illnesses as Haliburton doesn't sell medicine.
Edwards-Sharpton 2008.
Posted by: Menstrual Rainbow | March 22, 2005 at 10:18 AM
Max Cleland as well. The poor man has been suffering too long. Let them all die with....uh, dignity.
Posted by: youth_in_asia | March 22, 2005 at 10:38 AM
If Max Cleland has to die, can we at least keep his dead limbs handy to wave them about whenever John Kerry inokes his own Viet Nam/Khmer Rouge heroism?
Max would want it that way. He told Michael Schiavo.
Posted by: brainsample | March 22, 2005 at 11:20 AM
Hillary Clinton has already been awarded custody of Max Cleland's severed limbs. She's having them bronzed and mounted on the grill of her tour bus for the 2008 campaign.
Posted by: Liberal Larry | March 22, 2005 at 11:41 AM
I don't understand this "feeding tube" thing at all.
Nobody agitated to "pull the plug" on Christopher Reeve, maybe because he had a better career after his accident than he had before.
And HE certainly wasn't asking for Death with Dignity,far from it; rather he was pestering Congrees to throw more money at stem-cell research.
I'd reckon that I've been drinking too much, but now I suspect that I haven't been drinking enough.
Befuddled;
Posted by: Bilgeman | March 22, 2005 at 12:12 PM
Can this be the basis of a new Sci-fi flick called 'Hawking's Run?'
Da*n the Chimp! He even messes up the okay science fiction.
Posted by: Cricket | March 22, 2005 at 12:55 PM
If Hawkin's wheel chair had a V8 and four wheel drive, Bush and his - all about petrol - administration would let him live , so much they love selling petrol and destroying the planet.
Or Hawkin would have a good chance of escaping from a Sgrena type ambush.
Posted by: Friend of USA | March 22, 2005 at 02:35 PM
I find it highly offensive to intelligence-challenged people how humanity is being portrayed as being solely based on brain functions.
This Hawking guy apparently has alot of higher brain functions, him being a rocket scientist and all, but the rest of his body don't work.
So from an equal opportunity point of view, he needs to be allowed to die soon.
Posted by: Brutha | March 22, 2005 at 03:44 PM
Uh, oh. I'm frightened. I'm not physically disabled, but I too have never seen an episode of, "Queer Eye For the Straight Guy." Larry, pass me that bottle of Drano. I got some catchin' up to do!
Friend of USA, thanks for that, "visual," of Stephen Hawking zooming around in that V8, gas guzzling wheelchair! Thanks to you, I need a new keyboard!...again...I've either got to invest in Micro$oft, or stop reading this blog. Incidentally, the way to avoid a Sgrena-style ambush: S-E-R- T-I-N-E
P-E-N-
Damn, now I want to rent, "The In-Laws!"
Posted by: JannyMae | March 22, 2005 at 03:52 PM
JannyMae,
Sorry for your keyboard...
You might want to put a large clear plastic bag over it before visiting Blame Bush.
Better safe than sticky !
Posted by: Friend of USA | March 22, 2005 at 04:39 PM
Of coarse the Dems want Teri to be dead. That will qualify her to vote for them in 08.
Posted by: sorecarphagus | March 22, 2005 at 05:01 PM
"Of coarse the Dems want Teri to be dead. That will qualify her to vote for them in 08."
[shakes head]
OMG, I have to stay away from this forum...I think I'm gonna die from laughter! Brilliant!
Posted by: Sk | March 22, 2005 at 05:25 PM
The following link explains everything! The hubris, the overweening desire to win. Condi's acne on her back.
The link between major league baseball and Rethugnican politics has just been proven.
Thank Gaiya for Colin Powell.
http://theonion.com/news/index.php?issue=4112
Posted by: brainsample | March 22, 2005 at 05:56 PM
Okay...I've solved it.
Shovel Hawking's Brain into Schiavo's body.
Everybody goes home happy!
Next?
(I gave up the booze and tried huffing industrial paint thinner, howzat?)
Regards;
Posted by: Bilgeman | March 22, 2005 at 06:05 PM
Imbeciles! You've got it all wrong. Clearly, capital punishment is immoral except when imposed on the innocent. Just check the EU constitution, or maybe Das Capital, I'm sure it's in there somewhere (shuffle shuffle shuffle).
Posted by: Mitch | March 22, 2005 at 09:27 PM
The last I heard, Stephen Hawking was not in a persistent vegetative state.
Posted by: Lugosi | March 23, 2005 at 03:47 AM
Well, there you have it. Terri was labelled by the MSM as being in a persistent vegetative state because she refused to answer reporter's questions in a logical and coherent manner. She could only 'respond.' And that made her 'vegetative.' So, the media, trained doctors that they aren't, did like they always do: Diagnosed her in the press. Just like they do with most major law cases: The victims who perpetuate crime are tried and let go in the press. I wonder when the media are going to be fined for practicing both law and medicine without a license? And why hasn't McCain Feingold kicked them in their nasty little posteriors?
Posted by: Cricket | March 23, 2005 at 05:36 AM