Is Our Kids Learning?

Bush likes to shake his fist and talk all tough about those mean ol' terrorists, but when it comes to educating our kids, he's AWOL. Rather than giving that money to the teachers unions who so desperately need it, he prefers to give tax cuts to the wealthiest Americans. With his reckless "No Child Left Behind" policy, he bails out on our struggling schools and forces all our children into right-wing Bible camps. Furthermore, his draconian "accountability" requirements only serve to undermine our teachers and rob them of the flexibility they need to educate our children.

"Its time to stop sending new mandates from Washington to school districts without providing the necessary resources needed to carry out those new rules," states Kerry's campaign website. "Thats why John Kerry is proposing a new Education Trust Fund that means fully funding education, no questions asked. John Kerry will support teachers, reduce class sizes, and rebuild crumbling schools."

It's pretty simple, folks.

Less Work + Less Accountability + Higher Pay = A Better Product.

As anyone who has ever run a business knows, this is a formula for success.

Take my job here at Seattle Hemp Products, Ltd., for example. My boss called me into his office a few weeks ago and complained that my productivity had declined and my quality of work needed improvement. I informed him that I was overworked and underpaid, and was tired of him looking over my shoulder all the time. If he would just give me all the resources I need with no strings attached or oppressive standards to meet, I'd be far less incompetent. He balked at first, but when I told him to THINK OF THE CHILDREN, he enthusiastically agreed and gave every slacker in the shop a huge raise. When I came back to work after the big lay off, I was tanned, rested and ready for our wildcat strike the following week.

By demanding that school show positive results in order to maintain federal funding, Bush is putting the cart before the horse. That's no way to run a business, and it's certainly no way to run our public school system.

John Kerry's revolutionary 3-level ThinkSmart Plan to improve public education has been endorsed by the NEA, a grassroots organization founded on those very principles. Rather than focusing on test scores as a key indicator of student progress, the NEA supports"unprecedented public awareness, legislative lobbying, and a member empowerment campaign -- working for the things children need to be successful."

Me feel smarter already.

The John Kerry ThinkSmart Plan

1. Lower Standards, Less Accountability
Logic dictates that if schools aren't meeting standards, then our standards are just too damn high. Bring 'em down to a realistic level and even the slow kids will look like geniuses. John Kerry strongly believes that there are other ways to judge success besides test scores, which make teachers look incompetent and merely determine what a student knows and not how they feel. That's why he'll fight for free mood rings for every student, regardless of race, gender, or sexual orientation.

2. Better Pay for Teachers
America's teachers are so underpaid, that they can hardly afford to take three months of the summer off and strike well into November anymore. John Kerry believes that well paid teachers are happy teachers. Happy teachers means happy students. Happy students means happy parents. And as long as everyone's happy, who are we to complain?

3. Smaller Class Sizes
In an age of video games and shortening attention spans, it's hard enough to talk to one student, let alone an entire classroom. Our overworked teachers are finding it increasingly difficult to teach 30 kids, raise a family of their own, attend union meetings, engage in activist causes, and have sex with their students. John Kerry will work for smaller class sizes, so that every classroom will have exactly one student and one teacher.

Brilliant, indeed. But John Kerry didn't simply pull his knowledge of our public education system out of his ass. He knows first hand what terrible shape our public schools are in, as his chauffeur would point them out on the way to Fessenden School and later St Paul's every day for years. That's why he stand's shoulder-to-shoulder with the NEA to insure that every student leaves the public education system smart enough to vote democrat in November, but not so smart that their intelligence is insulted by anything democrats say.

So for our children's sake, for the sake of the children, and the children there for the sake of go I: Vote John Kerry. He's Lookin' out his limo window for our teachers, and for our kids, and for YOU.

Comments

[c]

Teacher recommended courses for future Democrats: public schoolers should take "Chad Punching 101" and private schoolers the more nuanced "How to be Limousine Liberals and Decry Bush's Tax Cut Savings Whilst Keeping Them, Nonetheless".

[Norman]

I think you left out an important cornerstone of the education platform, which involves afternoon and early evening after school "care" for the brats. It's important because parents are too overwhelmed with Survivor, American Idol, blogging, and working part time for the evil McDonald's to actually interact with their kids. This takes the responsibility away from the parents and puts it where it needs to be - the government.

[JannyMae]

Yeah, John Kerry, our new education candidate! And, of course, by all means, let's do away with those vouchers and school, "choice," which would further undermine our unaccountable, underpaid teachers! And, again, of course, those evil tax cuts for the rich, which economic expert Paul Newman says were, "borderline criminal," should be rolled back immmediately! Hillary says so, after all. Bring on the pain, along with the LOVE!

[Bad Commie]

If I put on my tin foil hat, no democratic bastard is going to be able to religiously edumacate me with their karl marx bible.

[der Fuhrer Dubya]

Kerry's policies are something we can all accept. Bush slashed (actually, massacred) federal education by 48%, because nimrods like him don't realize that *any amount* we spend on education, is worth it. Even if everyone's earthly possessions are invested in educating our children (and, this can only happen properly in the public schools), then society benefits. To even think about the price tag is an atrocity!! To try and interfere with the education process, well that's even worse.

[c]

Gee, was that just Bushitler satire or actual opinion??

I had my child in a *well-funded* school which had an 80% black and apartment living student population, and no amount of additional monies to that school could get parents to give better values to their (spirit) impoverished kids. The parents wouldn't come volunteer, attend PTA or teacher meetings, make sure that homework was done or discipline their children. Many were single-parent at-home exemplars (black and white) who watched trashy TV all day. Too many also did crack and entertained various men. Too many, but not all, treated their children as nuisances. Schools cannot realistically make up for these subcultural handicaps in their students.

In our particular urban school, a lot of time and resources were wasted on pro forma black history and self esteem projects, but from what I could see as a frequent volunteer there, all that the children needed were higher standards and demands placed on them. Accomplishment, not hand-holding and costly educator programs, builds esteem and success. All of the meaty and extra offerings in school don't do anything for kids who haven't motivation or parents who push them. Of course, this is true in poor, white rural schools and even for affluent surburban schools with their slackers.

My child who liked learning was constantly derided for it. She would come home and learn loads from a book or by writing or drawing on a piece of paper- not much money in those items and I didn't need elaborate educator courses or facilities to help motivate her. The few other children who wanted to learn and achieve had everything they needed at their disposal- only peer pressure at school was a hindrance.

Resource wise, even modestly funded schools can offer a decent education. But students and their families must want said decent education and many do not. What der Fuhrer Dubya must be advocating, then, is an extensive socialization program to inculcate bourgeois values in those students who are too lazy or hostile to the very idea of academic accomplishment. But that's not very PC and will take a totalitarian effort on the part of schools everywhere to force-educate entire family units to stop grooving to underachievement.

Is Kerry going to do change family values and dynamics or just throw more tax dollars at adequately funded but poorly motivated school populations?

[JannyMae]

C, I think we all know the answer to your last question...the liberal answer to everything that's failing: Throw more money!

[Liberal Hater]

Hell yeah - they just should pull themselves by the boot straps like all the Lakeside kids have to...I just saw a bunch of public school teachers cruising down Aurora in a white limousine...they fooled the tax payers again!

Thank god for scary organizations like these (http://www.cse.org/ - if the bigot Dick Armey is your chairman, you're in good shape) who are making it their life's goal to hinder education funding. Gotta save that money for killing those pesky Iraqis...

moderate taxing for education = bad
gigantic taxing and enormous deficits for unneccessary wars = very good, very good indeed...

[Liberal Larry]

Dude, if we just legalized marijuana like in Norway, all our problems would be solved.

[c]

"Liberal Hater" has a bad case of class envy (and bad taste in cars).

[JannyMae]

That's right, Liberal Hater, the problem with public education is we haven't thrown enough money at it yet!!!! If it wasn't for those evil, greedy republicans, we could put ALL of our funds into the Publik Schools so that the kids can be well edumacated when the terrorists blow them up!

[Liberal Larry]

Actually, he has a point. If we took all that money were using to kill pesky Iraqis and spent it on killing pesky fetuses, then we won't have to worry about educating our kids. There won't be any!

[L. Hater]

I think Big Larry took that directly from the Bush/Cheney web site...hey fanny mae, we are getting attacked by terrorists all the time aren't we? Oops, I just heard another bomb go off over at the elementary school...those poor kids...they never got a chance to have their time wasted by "pro forma black history and self esteem projects" - what a waste...

Not sarcasm: The problem with the Bush/Cheney white house is that they don't care about EVERY kid. They care about certain kids. I think we know what kids I'm talking about...(psst, white kids).

Don't worry, I'm not expecting a thoughtful response. I know ya'll only like to mock. Hell, I would too if my party had no merit to run on...

[Amber]

Hater, I'm confused. Who cares about poor black kids, the party offering them school vouchers to escape from failing schools or the party pocketing money from the NEA to fight giving the kids that choice?

[c]

You're so right, Amber. Liberal Hater is giving the "Republicans are racist" libel an illogical try.

I live in a big city, majority black, and all of the good liberals I know send their children to posh private schools that, at best, have a few token minorities (doctors' kids, usually). These stylish Democrats all drive SUV's, have a vacation home or two, and are strongly opposed to school vouchers for the economically disadvantaged. They say school choice might undercut our public schools for those other people. Of course, these adequately funded schools are so failed and dangerous that they wouldn't d-r-e-a-m of sending their kids to them. But, consistency is the hobgoblin of small minds and these people are big thinkers---

Btw, does anyone know of any NEA endorsed and anti- school choice Congressional Democrats who send their children to inner city schools? Surely, there must be a few, but I can't think of any. Shouldn't ALL Dem pol's who vote against choice also vote with their children by placing them in these failed public schools that others, especially poor blacks, are forced to attend? Who are the real racists, indeed?

[Grog]

I must take umbridge with some of the comments made by c (if that *is* her real name), in her first post.

I think the cultural conditions 'c' describes are a result of the fact that Gee Dumbya has slashed federal elementary/secondary funding by -48% during his term. No wonder, poor people despair of ever having a chance to get a decent education. I would give up to, and have a lackadaisical attitude if I knew my government wasn't going to give me an education.

And we shouldn't poo-pooh good programs like self-esteem education. It is obvious: if someone feels really good about themselves, they will get good grades, will be civil towards others, and will be a good citizen in general.

I don't mind if some rich democrats vote against vouchers, then send their kids to private schools. They did their part for the common good by casting a vote against so-called "school choice". They deserve to take care of themselves, if they want.

[Liberal Larry]

Actually, Bush has increased education spending more than any president in recent history. The problem is, he keeps smearing those little "higher standards" and "accountability" boogers on everything. When you give money to a homeless man on the street corner, do you attach a whole bunch of draconian demands to it? When you put money in the collection plate at church, do you require the clergy to provide you with charts and spreadsheets? When you send a donation into Jerry's Kids, do you bitch and moan because he keeps demanding more and more money and never shows results? Americans need to stop being so selfish and simply open their wallets to the government. Once we learn to think of taxation as a form of tithing, we'll all look forward to April 15th as a day of compassion and charity, rather than something akin to being anally raped.

[c is an initial]

Grog,

My child attended an inner city school in the 90's under Clinton. It was failed then and is failed now, despite good funding from our property taxes. Even teachers told me money has NOTHING to do with the problems in these schools, except as a function of the class of student. When you have disfunctional families and communities trapped together in school ghettos and an educational system that expects very little from them, you, of course, get very little from them. A few bright souls thrive by the grace of their abilities and determination, but most students remain warehoused in bad schools they have no other choice than to attend.

Do you seriously think that public schools have just started to get bad in the last couple of years and hence your "umbrage"???? You must not have any school-age children, yes?

[L. Hating]

Lets look at Texas, where yer man left his mark with the "no child left behind" sham (now a federal program with some privatized twists). Schools are funded by how well the students fare on culturally biased standardized tests like TAKS (Texas Assessment of Knowledge). School officials and principals need high scores to secure funding for their schools so the low performing students, mostly latinos and blacks, are encouraged to go quietly.

Meanwhile, the the Texas Education Agency falsifies the records by not recording all the dropouts - also to pump up their grad rates, they include GED numbers. Principals are encouraged to keep kids who normally score poorly, from taking the tests at all. They can be held back grades without ever taking the test - for up to three years. But usually, they just dropout - so thats why they aren't motivated - they don't have a chance and our government has no interest in giving them one.

On the vouchers, you're kidding, right? Bush fooled T-Kennedy into going in on an education reform bill and then only provided 2/3s of what he promised in the budget (who got the hit? rural ed, special ed, and tech ed). But Bush's budget does include 5 billion for voucher programs for private schools.

[c]

Let's get this straight: The Texas public school system is so corruptly vested in reporting favorable scores that it arranges for the worse performing students not to test, AND the Texas public school system administers culturally biased tests so as to disadvantage many of their students in their scores? Boy, that really is stoopid.

Logic hating, do you believe Bush and our government want certain students to fail out of unspeakable spite against Latinos and blacks, or so that we can keep paying billions on welfare and jail? Does Halliburton figure in here, somewhere?

[Liberal Larry]

Give it up, L.Hating. It's no use. I guarantee that the eyes of these reich-wingers glazed over when they read "culturally biased standardized tests", and they passed into a coma when you informed them that blacks and Latinos are all "low performing students". Cons don't like to be reminded that minorities are all helpless, weak, and dumb - and whites are to blame for it. They prefer to live in a fantasy world where a person's skin color has nothing to do with their ability to learn. It's their racist way of ducking responsibility for the attrocitites they committed against minorities for the past 10,000 years.

[Liberal Larry]

C -

Imagine you were taking a test, and a question like this popped up:

"Julio had two tacos. Maria had three tacos. Julio gave Maria one of his tacos. How many tacos does Maria have?"

How are you, a white European, supposed to answer a culturally biased question such as that? What are "tacos"? What kind of name is "Julio"?

Confusing, huh? Now imagine a 10 year old kid trying to answer it. No wonder so many of our inner city youths drop out of school and go on shooting sprees.

[JannyMae]

Another test question: Ahmed has 3 sarin warheads. Abdul has 2 sarin warheads. Ahmed launches one sarin warhead into a group of Iraq citizens. How many Iraqi citizens are killed in the attack? Boy, I've always loved story problems.

[Liberal Larry]

Train A is heading south at 50 mph. Train B is heading north at 100 mph. On a 100 mile track, how long will it take for each train to meet?

How the hell am I supposed to know? I've never rode a train in my life.

[c]

OK, I cede your point, Liberal Larry. Those foreign words do culturally confuse me from adding 3 +1 because I am not sure what country Julio is from. And I haven't had a taco for days. It truly must be difficult for blacks and Latinos to know American culture without benefit of schooling, television sets, and passes to leave their compounds.

And ditto about all of those train word problems. Also, beakers full of liquid and orienteering along Elm Street cultural stumpers.