The Washington State initiative process began in 1907 as a means to protect the working poor from capitalist exploitation, and labor unions from unfair competition. But in recent years, a few unscrupulous con artists have perverted the system for their own selfish interests. Under the guise of “democracy”, right-wing demagogues such as Tim Eyman have used the initiative process as a tool to limit or reduce taxes, cruelly forcing our elected representatives to actually adhere to a strict budget. Weaving a constant web of deceipt, Eyman employs slick marketing campaigns and bright, sparkly objects to hypnotize innocent Washingtonians into believing they’d be happier if they were allowed to keep more of their income, when we all know that the exact opposite is true.
You see, the American people are basically children – naive, impressionable children. It’s up to us grown-ups to protect them from evil conservatives who want fill their tiny brains with a lot of crazy ideas, such as getting something in return for their tax money besides clever new ways to take even more of it. Training these spoiled brats to become contributing members of a "community" rather than selfish individualists is a tough job and we get little gratitude in return. We help ourselves to a few measly pennies out of their precious piggy banks and give them fantastic sports stadiums and magic choo-choo trains to nowhere in return, but they’ll still turn right around and stab us in the liver for a cheap tank of gas. Well, I’ve had enough! Do you hear me? ENOUGH!
A tip of the hat to the digital brownshirts at Orbusmax for unwittingly turning me on to the Northwest Progressive Institute, a nonpartisan, grassroots organization dedicated to fighting fascism by silencing all political opposition wherever they find it. Progressives like you and I are encouraged to report any conservatives gathering signatures or engaging in other suspicious activity, so that NPI can quickly form a response team to descend upon them like packs of screeching, gender dysphoric dogs. As a public service, their names and photographs will then be posted on the website as Enemies of the State.
For the sake of our democracy, I encourage all my readers to place the NPI Squeal Button on their own blogs, or simply staple it to their foreheads. If we're ever to win our civil liberties back from Bush’s fascist right-wing oligarchy, progressives must work together to put an end to the signature-gathering cromags who constantly seek to subvert our democracy by inviting people to vote on things.