John McShame has always been a quitter. He quit the Naval Academy to become a pilot. He went to Aviator School to learn to fly a fighter plane, then he quit flying just to lounge around a hotel in Hanoi for five years. He quit soaking up the hospitality of the Vietnamese People and came back to the states, where he quit his wife and family. Then in 1981, he up and quit the military to become Senator of Arizona. This year, he decided to quit being a senator and run for peeResident. Now, surprise! suprise!, he's announced that he's quitting the presidential debates, claiming that the American People need their elected leaders to be in Washington right now, working out a deal to save our ailing economy.
Wrong again, Chimpy McShame! What the American People need right now is leadership! What the American People need is to gaze upon the angelic visage of Barack Obama and know that everything's going to be alright. Their mortages being forclosed, their jobs being shipped overseas, and their health care costs going through the roof, the American People yearn to tune into the television Friday night and have a politician telling them exactly what they want to hear, yet saying nothing. Obama's been doing just that since the start of his campaign. He means to do it tomorrow night as well, whether the coward McShame decides to show up, or not.