Barack Obama; A Reagan Conservative?

As Super Tuesday draws near, it appears that either Hillary or Obama will win the Democrat Party nomination and therefore the Presidency. I've been holding off an making an official endorsement because I love them both as if they were my own two lesbian mothers, with huge teats from which I shall suckle until I am fat and happy and can suckle no more. Having either one of them in the White House would make any Progressive as giddy as a freckled schoolgirl frolicking in a meadow on a bright summer morn.

But hold onto your bonnet, Half-Pint, because something is amiss in Walnut Grove. With their crops succumbing to the effects of global warming, Pa and Mr. Edwards have taken jobs delivering nitroglycerin to a nearby mining camp. Meanwhile, Nellie is up to her usual tricks, and a suprised Laura finds Albert smoking crack behind the schoolhouse with Willie Oleson.

For those of you who may be too conservative to understand the metaphor, what I am talking about is Obama's bizarre behavior of late, behavior that may cause many voters to wonder where his loyalties truly lie. First of all, his disrespect and mistreatment of the Clintons betrays a deep-rooted hatred for successful Black Americans. However, it's Obama's gushing praise of Ronald Raygun that alarms me the most.

"I think Ronald Reagan changed the trajectory of America in a way that Richard Nixon did not and in a way that Bill Clinton did not." Obama told the Las Vegas Review Journal. "He put us on a fundamentally different path because the country was ready for it."

Correction, Mr. Obama: Ronald Reagan was the most evil President in American history. Even the Shrub pales in comparison. How can any of us forget how that shriveled, old, B-movie actor banned labor unions, closed down the mental hospitals, raised taxes on the poor and put flowers on Hitler's grave? Let us also remember how his saber-rattling destroyed a perfect opportunity to forge an enduring friendship with the Soviet Union, an opportunity that sadly will never come again because the Soviet Union no longer exists. But Reagan's greatest crime of all, the one for which he shall never be forgiven, was that he restored a hope and enthusiasm for America'a future that Jimmy Carter worked four long years to crush. Reagan's jingoist rhetoric about a "Bright Shining City On a Hill" sparked a dangerous form of patriotism that lingers to this day. If Obama won't at least follow the Democrat Party by-laws and speak of Ronald Reagan only in the high-pitched whine of a liberal consumed with disgust for a man who personified everything we despise about this imperialist country, then he can expect no support from me come November.

Like I said, I'm not ready to officially endorse Hillary just yet. But I'm not going to waste my vote on someone who may only be pretending to be just to the left of Chairman Mao so he can get into office, and  then tear away his progressive mask to reveal he's been the Gipper all along.

Comments

[meluckycharms]

1st.

[meluckycharms]

Now that we've got that out of the way, let me retort. How can you NOT endorse the first black woahman prezedent? Billary will usher in the brave new world that Ruinald Rackgun destroyed in the USSR. Everyone will be equal and men will love men and whoaman will love whoaman just as goddess intended. Baraaack is a man baby, and man cannot be trusted.

[Talking Toaster]

Can’t progressives find a compromise?

Obama could be Sweet Hillary’s VP and suckle Bill's phalanx (VP = Vagina Press worker).

With some Modern Love the three could retreat to the Lincoln bedroom and everyone would get something - somewhere.

[camojack]

"...I'm not ready to officially endorse Hillary just yet."

What's up with the "SWEET HILLARY" link/picture on your sidebar then?

[RWing Nut]

That's HilBillys dream ticket Barrack as mandingo and VP. Doncha know the Progyssve mantra, "blacks are incapable of doing anything for themselves. Therefore, they have to vote Dimocrat so we can take care of them on the plantation.

[The Exorcist]

Yes, it is quite disturbing for Barezko Hussein to speak highly of Raygun. But nothing is more disturbing than Iceman's link to the Horse & Homo Stable from the previous post.

Holy shit! Where the hell did you come up with this in-depth look behind the scenes of a Democratic CockUs?

http://lbn.threat.tv/mrhands.mpg

[Rico]

Billary's Nightmare: A black man that does not need their help

[Cricket]

Albert smoked crack on Little Outhouse on the Paririe? WHY HAVE THERE BEEN NO TABLOIDS covering this? I betcha Nellie had something to do with it...

[Reuben]

in light of this, i feel that the US should immediately surrender in iraq, impeach bushaiton and darth cheney for war crimes, treason and sodomy (the bad kind), invade israel, release all freedom fighters from gitmo and move them into vegas hotels, also surrender to mexico and move to stop climate change by renouncing the internal combustion engine and implementing a mandatory abortion policy.

[Reuben]

oh and vote for pon raul, and save this great nation from a fate worse than death and having boogers shoved into your mouth. both, at the same time. think about it people - do you really want that to happen?

[Hemp Flower]

larry i think he is just saying that to fool the stupid repuglascums!!!!!!!
he cant be regun he is black and that wood mean he hates himself!!!!!!

[Che Gaiavera]

That was my link Exorcyst. Actually, it was my honeymoon video.

What Hill needs is a wildly popular talkshow host to endorse her, like Rikkie Lake, or Steve Wilkos, or maybe Dr. Phil (Although he may be tempted to analyze her relationship. Scratch that, and somebody have him whacked, will you?)

[Dave]

Yes, repukes join the 4% revolution! Vote Ron Paul!

[Friend of USA]

There should be at least one illegal Mexican immigrant as a candidate for the presidency.

Part of the debates should be done in Arabic.

A woman's vote should count for two votes.

In bath houses across America there should be 3 feet high voting machines that gay men can use without using their hands.

The first hundred voters at any voting stations should receive a complimentary bag of cannabis.

White voters should be refused access to the voting boots until the right number of black votes has been attained.

Canadians should be allowed to vote in the US elections, as long as they show up in an ear flap beaver hat.

[Motor Breath]

Heh-hehe-heh-heh....hehe-heh-hehe-heh...you said beaver hat...heh-heh-hehe-heh-heh-hehe

[aelfheld]

Umm, that's not a teat they're offering you to suckle.

Set your sights a little lower.

[The Exorcist]

"That was my link Exorcyst. Actually, it was my honeymoon video."

Dayum Che! You are indeed the horse whispererererer. I had no idea you were working the Democrat CockUs's. Can you train my precious Myster Ed to perform such tricks?

[Motor Breath]

This is hilarious. BJ "I feel your pain" Clitman has a "dream"

Check it out.

[The Exorcist]

(Overheard last night as plates and wine glasses were crashing off Bill's head in the Hillary campaign-bus in response to Kennedy's endorsement of Barezko)

"This isn't the first time he left a white woman for dead, Hillaray! It's not like I fucked Chelsea again! Take it out on heeyum, not mayee!"

[Che Gaiavera]

Can you train my precious Myster Ed to perform such tricks?

I'd sure as hell love to try. The question is, are you myn enough to be one of his tricks?

[The Exorcist]

"are you myn enough to be one of his tricks?"

You bet your butchered ass I'm myn enough, Che!

http://lbn.threat.tv/mrhands.mpg

Just because I'm a progressyve "male" doesn't mean I'm not butch enough to take a pounding for the good of the party.

http://lbn.threat.tv/mrhands.mpg

I'll put my ass through a meat-grinder if I need to prove my point any more clearly.

http://lbn.threat.tv/mrhands.mpg

I mean, just look at all those guys on the loading dock that I had to pin down with my powerful arms and plow my hammer all the way up their butt to make a point. You just can't get any more direct than that.

Or, as you/I.C. have now demonstrated, perhaps there is a more direct way to prove you're a registered Democrat when you cast those four votes at the polling place behind the Horse & Homo Stable.

http://lbn.threat.tv/mrhands.mpg

[Friend of USA]

Barack Obama; A Reagan Conservative?

Well maybe it was Reagan who was a Obama Democrat.

[Tailfetha]

What about Reagan's insidious plot to stuff moldy old government cheese down the throats of innocent poor people and make them so constipated they didn't feel like going to vote. Just where was Obama when they handed out the cheese?

[Fist of Etiquette]

Relax, folks. This is simply politics. Senator Obama knows that, to make change, one must first get elected president, and to do so, one must sometimes hold one's nose and pander down to Middle America. It doesn't mean a thing.

I fully expect one day during her presidential campaign that Cindy Sheehan will gush a little bit about her old nemesis, George W. Bush. Don't hate the player, hate the game.

(...and the Zionists.)

[Che Gaiavera]

First Edward "Tiny Bubbles" Kennedy betrays Hillary, and now Al Reuters commits an insult to Mohammed by listing 7 Religion of Peace nations in its top 10 most dangerous places on earth!

1: Somalia
2: Iraq
3: Afghanistan
4: Haiti
5: Pakistan
6: Sudan
7: P. R. Congo
8: Lebanon
9: Zimbabwe
10: Palestinian Territories

Can't we issue a fatwah or call for Mr. Reuters' head in the name of peace?