Teddy Bear Teacher: Courageous Brit, or Ugly American?

The term "Ugly American" is typically applied to arrogant Westerners who travel abroad and refuse to respect the customs and traditions of the places they visit. This phenomenon is especially prevalent in Muslim nations where American travelers think they have a right to commit unspeakable crimes - such as chewing bubble gum on Tuesday in the presence of an unmarried woman, or wearing their underwear on the outside of their pants - without paying any consequences for their actions.

British teacher Gillian Gibbons probably thought the Sudanese people would be grateful to her for educating their children and injecting a little bit of hope into their miserable lives - but she would soon learn the error of her arrogant ways. As tolerant as Muslims are of other cultures and religions, they rarely receive the same courtesy from Westerners in return. When Gibbons encouraged her students to name a teddy bear after the Prophet Mohammed in total defiance of the Holy Quran's scriptural bloodlust for plush toys, it was the last in a long succession of infidel straws. She was arrested and faced a punishment of 100 lashes. The sentence was later reduced to 40 lashes when it was revealed that she had never been raped. The sentence was reduced even further after the trial - 15 days in jail and permanent barring from FAO Schwartz, Khartoum.

Some may consider her punishment "barbaric", but Muslim culture is in many ways more advanced and compassionate than our own - as proven by the Sudanese President graciously granting Gibbons a full pardon. The teddy bear, however, was ceremonially beheaded live on Al Jazeera this afternoon. Angry crowds then dragged him from his cell and hung him from a construction crane, where he was disemboweled, dismembered, and burned alive as prescribed by the Holy Quran.

Gibbons flies back to London tonight having never served a single day of her sentence, blissfully ignorant of the irreparable damage she has done to both her nation's reputation, and the deep friendship shared between Muslims and Christians everywhere.

She may be British, but in the eyes of the world Leeza Gibbons is the ugliest American of them all.

Comments

[lanebrain65]

Is it? Can it be? Is it true! YES!
FIRST!

[Pellucid]

I am first! Take that! This woman should do the right thing and return to face justice.

[Hemp Flower]

Why do so many of you want to be first? Should we all finish at the same time because we are all created equal, we should remain equal.

You are not being very progyssive.

[Intellectual Conservative]

How dare that teacher be so culturally insensitive and name the teddy bear Muhammed just because the students took a vote and that's the name they chose?

Wait a second .. my bad .. democracy in their eyes is bad too :)

[Menstrual Rainbow]

The Sudanese clerics were saying that the Teddy Bear misnaming was part of a Western plot to make Islam look ridiculous. Praise Allah that they dodged that bullet!

[Im.mad.as.HELL!]

I'm for flooding the market with anatomically correct Mo dolls so they will know the difference between their pedophile, thieving, murdering, prophet and a teddy bear.

The doll would have a turbine or one of those Afghan hats that Ben Laden wares. It would be wearing a set of color coordinated rags shirt and loose pants and well wore sandals. Dark beady eyes, broad/flat nose above a large obnoxious mouth and a three to four day stubble with a lice infested mustache.

Even the little kids in her class knew the difference, for Pete's Sakes.

PS The head is removable.

[Intellectual Conservative]

I say send all the Islamic countries food aid .. consisting entirely of pork products

[Fist of Etiquette]

Only you can prevent knee-jerk jihads.

[stoorat]

What we need to be asking ourselves is, "What can we do to make this horrific trampling of the rights of jihadists go away?" Can we offer up a segment of our own population for ritual beheading as penance? Throw acid in the faces of our women? Disfigure Care Bears across the Western Hemisphere?

Tell us! We want to appease!

[camojack]

Ummm...it wasn't a Teddy bear; it was a Mohammed bear.

[megapix]

U.S. Finds Iran Halted Its Nuclear Arms Effort in 2003

By MARK MAZZETTI

A new assessment by American intelligence agencies, which concludes that Iran’s weapons program is on hold, contradicts a report two years ago that Tehran was working inexorably toward building a bomb.

---------

Now isn't that nice? All that huffing and puffing by Cheney and Bush, and all for nought. Mind you, they knew what they were at all along. But it will harder now to sell a massive bomb attack either to Americans -- or to US allies.

And bloody good news it is too.

[megapix]

U.S. Finds Iran Halted Its Nuclear Arms Effort in 2003

By MARK MAZZETTI

A new assessment by American intelligence agencies, which concludes that Iran’s weapons program is on hold, contradicts a report two years ago that Tehran was working inexorably toward building a bomb.

---------

Now isn't that nice? All that huffing and puffing by Cheney and Bush, and all for nought. Mind you, they knew what they were at all along. But it will harder now to sell a massive bomb attack either to Americans -- or to US allies.

And bloody good news it is too.

[Fist of Etiquette]

I haven't been this incensed since they caught the Snuggle fabric softener mascot reading The Da Vinci Code to a bunch of pre-schoolers.

[feelthelove]

Well, that's not all the Snuggle Fabric Softener Bear has done. He and the Pillsbury
Dough Boy have had a 'thing' going for quite some time. If they were outed in a Muslim country they would also be dropped from a tower after being tied up so they couldn't escape and stoned.

Merciful indeed.

[feelthelove]

Can we send Chucky to the Sudan?

[Che Guebeara]

You used your bratty 13-year-old niece's bear for that photo, didn't you Larry?

Is your baboon (Peace be unto his rashy red ass) petitioning really hard for a name change right about now, Arbiter?

[xxxliberal]

Larry has a niece? Good Gaia. I betcha he put the teddy bear in some compromising
positions and had its stuffed genitals mocked after a particularly sexy lapdance
by Barbie at the toy store Gitmo franchise.

[Dave]

The hacks in the right wing noise machine got it all wrong. This lady named a bear hillbilly jesus and it was southern baptist evangelical sudanese that went nuts and started to call for her death. Not the religion of peace and tolerance. This proves that the MSM is working hand in dark hand with christianity to force us into a theocracy.

[Dodger]

In light of this, I feel we should just surrender in Iraq.

[DonnieDarko]

Right on Dodger! Speak truth to power!

(Just like Irish/KB/megapix)

[Arbiter]

My pet/lyfe partner/lover/husband/wife baboon Mohammad (piece of luv upon his cute red rashy ass) and I are so upset about what this cruel women did that we're boycotting Will and Grace for a week (we're still tivo'ing it however).

[Butter Head ™]

For my own progressyve part, I am hereby putting my Beanie Babies up for auction. I could look the other way when Princess and Garcia were going at it but, after the blatant disregard for the Religion Of Peace that KKKristian womyn displayed I now have no other options.

Bidding starts at $1.00

[neohamster]

it's no wonder muslims are in a rage about this muhammed (peace be upon his nappy ho head) teddy - global warming caused by the filthy rich repuglicans has reduced the population of the once mighty herds of free and noble wild teddy bears in the sudan to a pathetic few which chose to evolve into a hardier species, all caused by bushes refusal to sign the oslo accordian.

[Arbiter]

Butterhead,

I'd like to bid. What pray tell are their names?

[Friend of USA]

I hope the ACLU is working on banning Teddy bears.