Working families get so little attention from politicians nowadays, that it's good to know there are still elected leaders out there who care about them. One such leader is our very own Sen. Patty Murray. Forced reluctantly into office by Brock Adams' gonads, Murray isn't a slick career politician - but she will never run from a fight as long as it's not against a foreign enemy who actively plots our destruction. Even if she has to spend every last penny that the magic Money Pixies bring her, Murray will continue her valiant struggle against the corporate elite who make profits at the expense of our working families - and Goddess help any non-working families who stand in her way.
Her latest Quixotic crusade is against the powerful asbestos industry, and it's a battle that hits close to home. The residents of Murray's hometown of Bothell, Washington have been enjoying asbestos as a tasty breakfast treat for generations. Next to to sucking the juice out of thermometers, there's nothing that says "It's Mornin' in Bothell" like a fresh bowl of Asbest-O's! So when Murray learned that not only is asbestos unfit for human consumption, it's also high in trans fats, our Mom in Tennis Shoes went ballistic.
Bush's Big Asbestos Buddies have been lying to us about the dangers of ingesting asbestos for far too long, and now working families are paying for it. Something had to be done. But what? Murray thought about it long and hard, devoting the full sum of her brainpower to finding a solution. Then, when they were just about to pull the feeding tube, she had a revelation.
Before anyone could talk her out of it, Murray introduced legislation to ban asbestos completely and punish those who continued to market it towards children. Included with the bill is $50 million for asbestos research and a public awareness campaign. Some may argue that it's silly to spend that kind of money educating people about the dangers of a substance that everyone pretty much knows is hazardous to your health, but those sorts of arguments typically come from Conservatives who have never even been to Bothell and seen her cousins stuffing their mouths full of asbestos or rolling around in big asbestos piles like mercury-poisoned, mutant, inbred pigs in a sty.
That's fine. They're entitled to their opinion, as long as they keep it to themselves. But if they try to come between Patty and working families, they will find themselves staring straight into the face of their own doom.