Katrina Hatches New Breed of Chickenhawk

"How can these people sleep at night and how can they choke down their food knowing it is purchased off of the flesh and blood of others?" Cindy Sheehan, War Mom

As the floodwaters slowly recede to reveal a thick layer of dead democrat voters, a new breed of chickenhawk has risen from the toxic muck, demanding our children be sent into harm's way without ever having served themselves. This time, the cowardly warmongers are not the bloviating Nazi propagandists of right-wing hate radio, but outstanding members of the progressive community. Brothers, sisters, and sexually ambiguous political comrades they may be, they have nonetheless taken it upon themselves to volunteer our young tots for hazard duty in the devasted gulf region.

Our beloved Maureen Dowd, for instance, thinks the 82nd Airborne should have parachuted into New Orleans through the eye of the hurricane, yet she sat out the entire Vietnam War with a convenient case of chlamydia. The profoundly flatulent Oliver Willis spent Desert Storm shovelling pastries into his porcine cakehole, but he has no problem sending someone else's kid to wade chest deep through raw sewage. Even the saucy Arianna Huffington has joined the neo-chickenhawk brigade, insisting that Bush should have pulled the troops out of Iraq and sent them to Louisiana - a state that poses no imminent threat, and where they'd be welcomed with "flowers in the streets". But I doubt we'll see ol' Zsa Zsa chasing armed looters down Bourbon Street any time soon. She's got a blog to run!

Don't get me wrong. I love these progressive icons as much as abortion itself. Perhaps this sudden spurt of fascism is just a temporary case of insanity, like when the entire political left became flag-waving jingoists for about 10 minutes after 9/11. Michael Moore helped us get through our patriotic dementia, and were back to sneering at the Stars & Stripes before Bush could finish milking his Pet Goat. I only hope liberal intellectuals like Arianna, Oliver, and MoDo quickly regain their senses, lest people start to think they're all a bunch of blubbering hypocrites.

Comments

[JannyMae]

Neo-chickenhawks! I love it, Larry!

[John Kerry]

Have you seen these pictures of downtown New Orleans?

Haven't seen that many cars underwater since the last boozefest up at Ted Kennedy's place.

[Jay]

This is hilarious!

[libmeister]

Oprah is my new celebrity hero, er heroine. What better person to reaffirm the greatness of Mayor Nagin. And I bet some mean-spirited, war-mongering Rethuglikkkans are going to come along and cite some irrelevant fact that the good mayor didn't follow the official evacuation plan in hopes of besmirching his new status as THE HERO OF NEW ORLEANS. Maybe the mayor had a reading disorder! I think it awfully mean-spirited for Republikkkans to try and take advantage of the mayor's natural shortcomings.

And what's with these so-called rescue workers who are pumping pollution into pristine Lake Ponchetrain? The next thing you know they'll have the smoke-belching electric generating plants up and running as well as the cars and buses (that the thoughful, environmentally aware mayor didn't use so as not to further pollute the environment which would soon face the added pollution from Katryna) which will soon be further polluting the environment by burning the oil we stole from Iraq.

And how long will it be before the pro-Bu$Hitler FEMA, rescue workers and military stormtroopers get out of New Orleans in order that it can be turned over to progressyve Democrats so they can restore New Orleans to its former utopian state?

[Damian G.]

"I love these progressive icons as much as abortion itself."

So true; as we all know, Planned Parenthood sent billions of crates filled with much-needed condoms (both with special heat activation AND ribbed for her pleasure) and RU-486.

Gaia bless these brave patriots fighting the unborn menace!!!

[CKCat]

Damian G,
You make such a salient point!

Were it not for NO Planned Parenthoodlums providing the superdome rapists with the priceless birth preventative sheaths, imagine the grief of the rape vic..err..objects of affection who would have been impregnated and felt obligated to carry the fetus to term, not to mention the debt of gratitude owed to Planet Parenthoodlums as well as the condom recipient-rapists for being so considerate as to not wanting to possibly infect the vic..err.. "object of their affection" with an STD!!

[John Kerry]

Over the past week, I have contacted all my good friends from my Swift Boat days. So, the 3 of us will be embarking tomorrow on a seek and destroy mission, during which we will be gunning down as many civilians as possible, burning their homes, and raping whatever women are left.

Speaking just for myself here, I'm looking forward to the Senate hearings again.

[The Powers That Be]

laughing hard

[Menstrual Rainbow]

If Louisiana had oil Amerikkka would be there now!

[camojack]

Chickenhawk...that am good eatin'!

[Menstrual Rainbow]

Oliver Willis has clearly been kidnapped, aside from his chickenhawkness he is also quoting reich-wing fascist John Derbyshire. Media Matters for America probably uncovered the truth about Hurricane Bush and locked up its members in Guantanamo Bay.

[Menstrual Rainbow]

Sorry for making three posts in a row, but if you go to Oliver Willis's site you will notice two things-

1) Unlike certain people I'm not banned from his site.

2) 'Neoconrloopy' has picked up an angle which we insufficiently progressyve types missed, Walmart are starving New Orleans-

"Walmart, Lowes and Home Depot typically have convoys of trucks ready to deploy building supplies as soon as a storm passes."

[Barbara BoxEater]

How many lives are lost in NO? This should be the total number of counts of manslaughter that Bush, Chaney and all their followers should be charged with!!!
There's one thing all us real Christians have to look forward to. All these so called God Fearing Republicans will burn in hell for their crimes on humanity.

[Barbara BoxEater]

It is unfortunately too rare in this world that we can see a clear thread from decisions to direct consequences of those decisions. This is one of those times.

The parallels between the unpreparedness for the aftermath of the Iraqi invasion and this hurricane may seem eerie, but they shouldn't be. This is, after all, the same administration that completely ignores the consequences of its decisions.

Unfortunately, they will probably continue to get away with it. During the next election, they will likely manage to bypass enough cerebrums by playing their two gut issues ("No men kissing!" and "No killing embryos!") to maintain a stranglehold on the government, thus guaranteeing more of what we've seen for the past 4.5 years.

[CavalierX]

Oh, Larry... SURELY you're not questioning Maureen, Oliver and Arianna's patriotism??

[CavalierX]

As for the Bush-Halliburton-Home Depot connection, everyone knows that Bush has Big Wood in his pocket.

No, wait... that didn't come out quite right...

[libmeister]

CK Kat,

Since converting to progressyvism, I've taken more of a liking to the term "Planned Abortionhood" to describe the true functionality of the organization originally founded by the misguided progressive, the racist Margaret Sanger.

We all have our clay feet, and Margaret Sanger's rampant racism was hers. Now don't tell any RethugliKKKan knuckle-dragger this, but the whole point of her support for abortion was to get rid of undesirable minorities by killing their babies...er, their fetus/cancer-like blob-of-tissue-in-the-womb. The inarguable logic is if there is less of them to screw up the rest of society the better off everyone else will be. And that's why its still true today that on a percentage basis of the population most abortions are performed on minorities.

Seriously, Margaret Sanger thought it was the height of compassion in her day to target minority birthrates so that the minority individual involved (it frees them up to better their lives) and society in general would benefit when their "unwanted" progency would then have no opportunity to grow up to be crooks, druggies and an overall financial burden to society.

From Margaret Sanger's POV, if she were alive today, no clearer example of this phenomenon can be found than what happened in New Orleans post-Katryna. We can't deny the video evidence, those huddled masses were far better off dead than suffering such indignities and unwantedness IN FRONT OF THE WHOLE WORLD FOR GAIA'S SAKE! How embarassing is that? It's something they'll have to live with for the rest of their lives. And they were well on their way to starving themselves into a euphoric death (a la Terri Schiavo) when FEMA got around to dragging its ass into New Orleans.

Now in his less progressyve days, Jesse Jackson even referred to abortion as the "black holocaust", but we were fortunate enough to pull him back on the reservation where he still is today. A real triumph on our part. But what is so fascinating abouto some of the misguided ideals of Ms. Sanger is the truth (whatever that is from day-to-day) that the basic tenets of her thought still exists today BUT WITH ALL THE RACIST COMPONENTS REMOVED!

Unfortunately, or fortunately (we are a big tent after all), abortion has simply become another form of birth control of the white liberal race. And the less there are of us to lovingly and patronizingly lead the black man and black woman into the Promise Land of white liberal utopianism, the longer this is going to take. Damn Mother Nature at times and Rethugs all the time!

BTW, I wouldn't broadcast this far and wide because there are some people who don't understand the progressyve nuance of all this and it might make us look bad. That's why a majority of white progressyves aren't very vocal about this growing reality. You know, loose lips sink ships.

[libmeister]

Oh, oh, the feces is going to hit the fan. That reich-wing media outlet, ABC News, is carrying this story about Governor Blanco's and Mayor Nagin's (rhymes with "noggin", something he apparently wasn't using at the time) culpability in the Katrina fiasco.

You can find it here: http://abcnews.go.com/WNT/HurricaneKatrina/story?id=1102467&page=1&CMP=OTC-RSSFeeds0312

I wonder what Oprah thinks, er...feels?

[Moonchild]

The image of Oliver Willis repelling from a Blackhawk helicopter, striking that arms-folded pose from his website, and declaring an end of Major Hurricane Operations makes the naughty bits tingle. So, why is he denying the world what it needs? This country has given him so much. It's time he gave something back!

[rb]

Yes, it is hitting the fan in LA.

Here is a detailed timeline of LA state government, Blanco, and her reasons for wanting to see Nagin fail. Explains a lot!

http://www.americandaughter.com/frontpage.html#corrupt

[Cr'Q'T]

I have lined up the blog reading supplies: Windex wipes and rubber sheets for the keyboard for those little accidents that seem to happen to the electronics when I visit this blog.

M. Sanger is Menstrual Rainbow's patron saint.

Will there be any fetal expulsion marches this time?

[Cr'Q'T]

Oliver Willis is repellent.

I would love to see him try to rappel out of a chopper. It would be so one sided...I don't think any helicopter pilot in their right mind would take on that challenge!

[JannyMae]

Menstrual Rainbow, and all you other ladies, you must see the latest thread on http://dummiefunnies.blogspot.com/

[DW]

John Kerry wrote: "So, the 3 of us will be embarking tomorrow on a seek and destroy mission, during which we will be gunning down as many civilians as possible, burning their homes, and raping whatever women are left."

You forgot to add: "... in a fashion reminiscent of Ghengis Khan."

[Che]

Seriously, though. Bush's quagmire in N.O. is a direct result of his failure to plan. The destruction Rumsfeldt conjured out of this air was effective enough, despite progressyves' doubts to the contrary, but he didn't have the resources available to deal with Louisiana after the storm.

Having squandered the military out on trivial pursuits like national defense in Iraq, Korea, and Afghanistan, we no longer have enough uniformed inner-city minorities like Bubblehead available to deal with a truly worthy humynitarian cause, which is what the military is all about.

Lacking sufficient mynpower, I forsee a draft, and not just through the Superdome's roof.