Liberal Larry's Big Bag O' Hate Mail

It's been a while since I've opened the Big Bag O'Hate Mail, and it's full of some real doozies.

nmark@lvcm.com pontificates:

Listen FAG, I know you get a lot of emails about how f**king stupid and ignorant you are, and I think you get off on it, but, this I mean. I really think you're worthless. F**k you and your entire being.

Is that you, Gramma?

In between spewing obscenities in all caps, M Hertz wrote:

ever consider the idea that maybe, just maybe what drives bush is an overwhelming sense of duty... a duty to protect the people of this country, even goofy ass holes like you.

Ever consider turning off Rush Limbaugh? Sure, Bush is doing his duty. He's doing it all over the Bill of Rights, all over the International Community, and all over the environment. You'd know that if you'd ever completed high school.

Dean Hauer sputters:

Interesting rant,...if you really believe what you wrote,...your an idiot! Think more and write less. TTFN, DH

That means a lot coming from a guy who begins his ellipses with a comma. Turn off Rush Limbaugh and go to college. NEXT!

John Rogers snivels over my recent post concerning Bush's untimely siesta at the Pope's funeral:

I think that any reasonable person would conclude that bush is praying not sleeping. I'm not a bush supporter, but lets not misrepresent facts here

Look at Bill Clinton in that photo, John. Is not praying, is he? Why would the best friend of Rev. Jesse Jackson, a man who sits at the right hand of God, not be praying? Because it's not time to pray yet, is it, John? It's time to gawk at the hot chick in the sexy nun costume across the way. Bush is snoozing no matter what Rush Limbaugh tells you. Go to college.

Lee Pickett eloquently writes:

I cannot believe you are serious about all the stuff you write. I have been someone who has participated for about 40 years in efforts to feed the hungry in Africa, starting with the Biafrans in the late 60s. It has been my observation that most of these famines occur in Communist and Socialist countries, always blamed, of course, on droughts and other weather conditions. Strange thing is, the drought seems to stop right at the borders of these countries. How do they get the rain to do that? Vast right wing conspiracy I guess. A thought for you: if someone is expected to give to help others, he must have enough left over from his own family's need to be able to give it. If he is to provide for his family and have some to give to others, then he must sell something, used cars, vegetables from his garden, his labor as he works for someone else. This is the only source of money, in short, capitalism, based in self interest. Only if one makes money in this way, will he be able to care for self and others who cannot care for self, otherwise, one becomes a needy mouth that must be fed by someone who does have extra. Probably good hearted people are forever trying socialism, liberalism, and communism, and it never works for the simple reason that people that have things somewhat resent it when others demand a share of it because they "have more than they need". Put yourself in the position Bill Gates. The billionth dollar you make is just as much yours as the first one you ever made. The feeling is shared by all, right on down the economic ladder. The ones that want to "take from the rich and give to the poor" always look upward, certainly never at themselves. Take Teddy Kennedy for instance, I have never seen him breaking his neck to divest himself of his fortunes and giving it away. I don't expect him to do that, it would be unnatural, I am just saying that what the typical left leaning, liberal, socialist, says, isn't what he does. He just demands that everyone else do it. Have you read the Animal Farm by George Orwell?

Now I'm snoozing! Yes, I read Animal Farm in the ninth grade. Obviously you didn't, or you'd know that Orwell champions socialism, while condemning capitalism. Here's a clue, since you can't seem to buy one: "Man is the only creature that consumes without producing. He does not give milk, he does not lay eggs, he is too weak to pull the plough, he cannot run fast enough to catch rabbits. Yet he is lord of all the animals. He sets them to work, he gives back to them the bare minimum that will prevent them from starving, and the rest he keeps for himself." Stop listening to Rush Limbaugh, borrow the book from the library, and have your mommy read it to you.

Michael Martinez would be funny if he weren't so damn pathetic.:

Wow I just came from your site blamebush.com! Normally I am a very moderate republican who has no problem with liberal democrats and can get along fine with them. Hell I have some liberal friends and we have fun arguments about stuff and end up laughing it off. But your comments!!! WoW!! You actually bring out the inner right-wing-evangelical-facist that has been trying to get out!!!! Whenever I read your posts I just wish you were in front of me so I could beat you down. That one you wrote about playing the kazoo in The Passion boy oh boy I wish I had been the one telling you to please stop. And then you encourage me to do something by playing it again in my face!! That would have been a glorious day for extremists like me. After you would be on the ground in pain I would proceed to pull down my pants in front of everyone and take a hot steamy shit on your face! Ha! If you dont mind you think you could post this on the "From the mouths of the facists" or whatever you have on there. And also please reply with one of your "IM GOING TO TELL OFF THAT REPUKE or REPULIKKAN" or whatever the hell you dipshit losers say nowadays. And for all of us just post your address and a picture of what you look like! I am just dying to find out. But thats right you cant because of all the death threats you have probably recieved from right wingers like me. But what do I know, I am just a narrow-minded small town repuke who doesnt truly understand the way the world works like you. After all your whole outlook on life is "BLAME BUSH!" From the way you sound it seems like you don't believe in God. But when you die and you are standing there waiting to be judged I want you to think of me. When God tells you that all those facist right-wing evangelicals were right, I just want you to think of me. When I die and you are burning in hell I will ask God permission to visit you so I can say something like "Larry, I have asked God to please forgive you of your sins and allow you to be given a chance to be in heaven. And He said yes! You can come up now!" And right when you actually think you can leave hell I break the news that I was really lying and you cant leave. But hey when that happens you blame Bush, because he is the cause of all evil in this country. If a man rapes and murders a woman in a dark corner of the street he was obviously watching one of Bush's speeches with all the subliminal messages saying "Rape her.....rape her!" Isnt that right? Well anyway I didnt think I was going to type this much but you got me going. It was very fun getting this off my right-wing-extremist-facist-racist chest but it had to be done. Maybe you can make a Top 10 Hate Mail of All Time and put me as Number 1! Or hell maybe there has been worse than this. Anway I hope to see you in the near future so I can beat the living shit outa ya! Love, Conker a.k.a Facist-Racist-RightWingExtremist-Intollerant-EnviornmentHater- IgnorantRepuke-Nazi-NeoNazi-RightWingRedneck-ArabMurderer

Ladies and Gentleman, I give you our next Republican peeResident of the United States. Stop-Listening-to-Rush-Limbaugh-and-Go-To-College!

Jegg Gribben gibbers:

Great, Trash talking is more effective when backed up by facts. A set of hate-centered premises with only a skewed representation of reality does not make a truth. Max Cleland lost his limbs in a not combat accident picking up and unexploded grenade. That unfortunate event doesn't make him an expert on anything. Karl Rove has not been found to be a member of any hate group,(the KKK or Nation of Islam) while Democratic Senator Robert Byrd of West Virginia was. I look forward to more of your insight in future blogs.

I'm sick of educating you cons! For the last time, Senator Byrd was in the Klan as a kid, but only to study conservatives and learn how to one day defeat them. In his 100 year career as a U.S. senator, he's had a long record of defending civil rights issues. He has considered blacks to be human beings since at least 1982, and hasn't participated in a lynching for years. So turn off Rush Limbaugh and go to college.

Reading Nathan Brack's email gives me the strange urge to go rent I Am Sam again:

You're a good example of why drugs are illegal...The "W" stands for whooped your ass. Take that hippy-four more years!!!!

No, the reason recreational drugs are illegal, you moron, is so Bush's big pharmaceutical buddies can have a monopoly on the market and charge people $900 for an aspirin while putting little old ladies into prison for growing a few hundred pounds of glaucoma medicine in their basements. Stop listening to Rush Limbaugh and enroll in your local community college. Maybe then you'll be able to string a couple of coherent sentences together!

Finally,...after reading this rambling diatribe from "SnowOnMeJesus", I had a sudden urge to go rent I Am Sam again:

we dont need you here. if you dont like it go els were. i see your wasting your time being bitter at life looking at everyone elses problems. what you dont understand is hard work. or being usefull. leave your computer for a sec and go be usefull!! or get help. what ever you can muster up the strenth for. latter. buddy

At last, an educated con!

As I close the Big Bag O' Hate Mail once again, I'd like to thank Damian G. for coming up with some great new titles for the Right Wing Fascists on my blogroll. He's fairly bright for a right-wing idiot,... although that's really not saying much.

Comments

[KJ]

Man, you ripped those losers to shreds. I don't know where you find the time to write your genius prose, attend pro-Amerikkkan rallies (even though we don't deserve it) and rip off that fascist Grandma of yours (who does deserve it).

[Bubblehead]

I'm wondering if I can use the comments to turn off the bold tag... nope, that didn't work... maybe now... nope... one more try... yes, that did i... damn! Let's try it once more... yes! Take that, Bush the Bold Font Putter-Inner!

[Hankmeister]

What's wrong with all these kkkonservative hotheads? Why are they always spewing facts and maldictions all the time?

I mean, just like one man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter, so is one man's fact is another man's lie.

These warmongers aren't very nice people. They act like there's such a thing like objective truth (whatever that may be from one day to the next). The only truth I know is Bu$Hitler lied and people died and KKKarl Rove is a traitor because the nice progressyve Joe Wilson (who's married to one hottie CIA agent blonde bombshell) said he is. That's good enough for me.

To hell with official transcripts, exculpatory memos and the sub-committee report which claimed Wilson lied about his wife recommending him for the Niger trip and subsequently did a shoddy job on the Yellow Cake investigation. All I know is ROVE LIED...........

.......aarrrrrrgggghhhh .... where is my tinfoil hat?

The ...
Rovian ...
Mind ...
Control ...
Rays ...
are ...
getting ...
through !!!!!!!!!

[Hankmeister]

Reread Michael Martinez's comments. Doesn't he sound like a progressyve pretending to be a Rethuglikkkan kkkonservative? Kinda long-winded, too.

Larry, you better get a bodyguard or start packing a .45 Auto...

Oh, sorry. I forgot real progressyves don't believe in the Second Amendment since guns only have one use, to kill innocent people - ask any murderer.

Well, get your bodyguards to carry the .45s, like Rosie O'Donnell's and the rest of the brave anti-Second Amendment Hollywood celebrities' bodyguards do.

[aelfheld]

[Byrd] hasn't participated in a lynching for years.

The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.

[BobTheBuilder]

I'm Feeling BOLD

Wendy and I just LOVE the Professym. We always agree with the Professym "one hunnerd an ten percent!" Just like a couple of Rushies.

We wait by our little Apple computer for our marching orders and screaming points which are delivered by the Professym fresh daily ... well a few days a week ... well whenever the Professym drags himself away from the kitchen chemicals and midgets.

Oh darn it I just don't have the heart to leave the bold turned on.

Oh what the hell....

[West]

I now believe that we have definite proof that there is a sarcasm gene - and some people are lacking it.

The irony on this is so thick I could spread it on bread.

Thanks for the laughs, LL. As for the brilliant right wingers who hate you - I'm close to becoming a liberal just so's I will never, even by accident, be associated with them. But then, I'll be associated with liberals - damn, life just ain't fair.

[camojack]

Did that work? These people who don't turn off their HTML tags really WEAR ME OUT!!!

BTW Larry, have I told you lately that I hate you?!

[Bubblehead]

Darn you, Bob the Builder! Darn you to heck! Now I have to come in and turn your bold font off. There! The worst thing is, eventually Bush is going to come in here and turn off the bold in the main body, and my comment above is going to look like I've been drinking too much cough syrup. Well, since I'm going to get blamed for it anyway...

[Moonchild]

I've enrolled in community college, and the cars I sometimes sleep in at night when my rethug landlord tries to extort my rent money are tuned to Rush Limbaugh when I wake up in the morning. Please don't hate me.I was a progressive long before I took Lar's advice. I'm just trying to live the Amerikkkan dream(tm) and become a college profressym, just like all enlightened people. I'd just die if I found out any progressives hate me because I've been soiled by the fat, drug addict's open sewer of hate.

[Che Abu Charmouta Bin Laden Guevarito]

You people are sick. Poor JannyMae is probably curled up in a non-aborted fetal position, rocking back and forth on the floor, and inhaling Simple Green fumes because of all your unterminated bold tags. For shame!

I can't help but be discouraged by how many of Larry's detractors insist that Socialism doesn't work just because it hasn't worked in the past. The problem with Socialism in the past was that capitalists didn't throw enough money at it to make it work, but that's no reason to quit trying.

Did Thomas Jefferson quit trying to make the lightbulb when his first one didn't work? No, he blamed PG&E for turning his power off!

Did Alexander Graham Bell give up when his question, "Can you hear me now?" went unanswered? No. He assumed silent consent and declared victory in true progressive fashion.

Did France give up in WWI? ... Oh, I mean WWII? I mean French Indo-China? OK, bad example.

[Bush Ate My Soul...]

re: Listen FAG, I know you get a lot of emails about how f**king stupid and ignorant you are, and I think you get off on it, but, this I mean. I really think you're worthless. F**k you and your entire being.

Oh Larry... I am thrilled to see you finally accept the natural homoerotic urges that lie buried in all of us and come out of the closet.

I'm sure all of us Progressyves rejoice during this special moment.

Group hug, people!

And aelfheld, you owe me a new monitor. This was completely uncalled for:

[Byrd] hasn't participated in a lynching for years.

The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.

[motherofallposters]

Seeing all of these screaming bold tags make me think of an injustice that is going on in my neck of the woods and maybe yours. Where I live in South Louisiana Rush Limbaugh is on a 50,000 watt blowtorch of a radio station (WWL) and has been for years. They say it is a clear channel with nobody else on that frequency 870 AM for safety reasons so that instructions can be given out in the event of natural disasters and the like with out any interference anywhere in the country. This gives them an extremely large footprint.

Meanwhile Air America is broadcast from jerry rigged Radio Shack Walky-Talky cleverly positioned atop the ACLU center in Downtown. This puts our message in severe danger here in the Crescent City and gives the poorest of the poor and most venerable members of our society hardly a chance to know who to blame their poverty and ignorance on. Knowledge is power and without the proper scapegoats programmed into their little heads how are they to progress, and for that matter know the federal programs that will give them the tools to succeed in a world that they didn’t ask to be born into.

You have to wonder what their mothers were thinking when they decided not to abort them post haste. Well that is water under the bridge now.

The rethuglican controlled FCC refuses to give a larger license (more than 5 watts) to the owner of the walky-talky. They claim the reason is to limit interference with other stations, but I think that is more true than they would like to say. The interference they want to limit is the interference with their daily JackBooted parade of right wing hatred that starts at 11:00 AM and continues unabated until the convicted drug addict Limbaugh concedes the air at 2:00 pm to his local Right Wing Limbaugh wanna be.

Until this is changes I will picket the Right wing power house WWL located on Rampart Street. Even in the noonday Sun. I ask any of my brotheryn or Sisteryn with in reach of my keyboard to join me on this holy quest. I must caution anyone that wants to join me to come prepared with plenty of Sun Screen and the flavored bottled water of your choice because it is hot here and I don’t mean a dry heat. Also be prepared to hear plenty of murmurs form the passing tourist about mad dogs and Englishmen. It will not stop me. This my chance to speak truth to power and by power I mean total market domination. Just because the ratings are low for AA, I don’t think it should make a differnce.

Equal time issues are of no matter in the Deep south. All these people care about is market share. Not share the wealth.

[Bu$hCausedMyGout]

They need to put a rainbow in their heart. Maybe this will help(see link below). They're free downloads and Lib. Larry: you will enjoy this too. Listen to these rational thinking peace-lovers and it will erase all of that hate from the mailbag:

http://butterflyspirit.org/projects/mlnw_music.html

[Rosie O'Donnell]

What a golden resource!

This one is the best.

http://butterflyspirit.org/media/mlnw_112.mp3

Dennis Kucinich is sooo Dreamy! What I wouldn't do to hook up with a progressyve like hym!!!!! And after I've had a few episodes as the topper, I might even let him on top. A grrrl can dream, can't she?

[al-Bundy Martyr Brigades]

My left-wing progressyve infidel brethren, if I may make so bold, the injustices done to my fellow Muslims is much worse than anything you have had to endure.

For example, the infidel Man gives us no credit for our contributions to learning. Did you know we invented the zero, so we could respond to questions about what we've achieved in the last millennium?

Of course you didn't. We also invented algebra, to solve such problems as "If Mohammed's bomb blows his left hand twice as far as his right hand, and blows his right hand 50 meters, how far did his left hand go?"

[cr'q't]

Wow! Spray the Febreze and pass the Simple Green. I saw Janny. She was under the sink, sucking her thumb and wanting to make the bad man stop. Larry and the CKC were so enraged that thanks to Clinton's welfare reform she can't even afford the lame excuse for coverage that Medicaid is, nor is she eligible. She has *gasp, shock* Fallen Through The Cracks.

And Larry's Grandmother is a woman of rare wit, keen insight and the Keeper of the Bong. She is the one growing the glaucoma medicine.

[Bubblehead]

I hate Liberal Larry because he puts up a Big Bag O' Hate Mail post, instead of letting us call for investigations of the new SC(R)OTU(M)S nominee's kid, or discuss the latest addition to the Bush Body Count.

[Bubblehead]

Did you know we invented the zero, so we could respond to questions about what we've achieved in the last millennium?
Dammit, Brigades, now I've got to go get another keyboard, which Bu-shaitan probably won't even pay for!

[cr'q't]

Bubblehead, the SC(R)OTU(M)S has to stop and use Gold Bond. It is hoped that the new nominee KKKonstitution in Exile KKKonservative Roberts (no relation to Julia)
will nuke all us Progressyves into Infinity and Beyond.

That means for the rest of the Rash on the SC(R)OTU(M)S, they can't legislate from the bench. A POX on them!

[Bubblehead]

All I know is, if Shrub succeeds in getting the Dread Pirate Roberts on the bench, then we might as well just get involved in a land war in Asia!

[Damian G.]

Thanks for the props, Larry.

Remember: Friends don't let friends blog liberal.

[Liberal Larry]

You know, that open BOLD tag didn't show when I previewed it last night. Bush must have spiked my glaucoma medicine.

[DULL]

Lyberal (frickin) Larry I can't believe a progressyve like yourself would contribute to Rove's magnificent genius underhanded strategy (ran out of words for links) with your silly mailbag distraction. Even his secret wife is in on the strateejery by pretending to be outraged so that all you lefties will be placated with his false moderateness.

Your distraction almost makes me think you are one of us... Are you a "KK"Karl Rove plant? *Performs secret(ion) hand shake*

[Hankmeister]

Finally, principled opposition to Bu$Hitler's nomination of the right-wingnut thug John Roberts to the Supreme Court. The fill-in-the-blank petition is posted below:

Critical Urgent Community Action Bulletin
from the Progressive Action Network For American Progress
For Immediate Release

The Progressive Action Network For American Progress is extremely concerned by today’s news that President Bush has selected ___JOHN ROBERTS___ as his nominee for the vacancy on the United States Supreme Court. Unlike outgoing Justice Sandra Day O’Conner, the widely respected and admired moderate consensus sensible mainstream compromisist, ___JOHN ROBERTS___ has a shocking record of extremely extreme legal positions that fill us with grave concerns about ___HIS___ fitness for this critically crucial office.

Make no mistake: no one should be fooled by the administration’s public relations efforts or ___JOHN ROBERTS___’s seemingly “moderate” appearance. ___JOHN ROBERTS___ has a record that suggests that ___HE___ would deny women the right to reproductive choice, stop important life-saving medical stem cell research by extending the Patriot Act to draft their unwanted fetuses, and turn these conscripted fetuses over to dangerous tax-supported ‘Creationist’ religious laboratories. The Supreme Court is a lifetime appointment, and America needs to know whether ___JOHN ROBERTS___ supports the GOP’s secret plan of a Rush Limbaugh Jesus army of unwanted, unquestioning fetus zombies who will be trained to urinate on the Korans of Guantanamo detainees.

We should also point out that our opposition to ___JOHN ROBERTS___ has nothing to do with the nominee’s race and/or gender. We at the Progressive Action Network For American Progress have long been on record of standing up for the civil rights of ___WHITE MEN___, rights from which ___JOHN ROBERTS___ ironically, has benefitted. Sadly, rather than create programs and begin to work on the real problems that concern ___WHITE MEN___, the Bush administration has cynically forwarded an unqualified, token candidate like ___JOHN ROBERTS___ to mask its callous indifference to the ___WHITE MAN___ community.