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« Is Our Kids Learning? | Main | They Aren't Gay - they're FABULOUS! »

Liberal Larry's Fair Trade Gift Shop Now Open

Checking my stats for the 948,000th time last night, I was stunned to discover that this blog now has close to 950,000 hits a day. I had no idea I was that popular. For a brief moment, greed overcame me and I actually considered putting out a tip jar to make some cash, perhaps defray the outrageous costs of maintaining this site. Then I regained my composure and remembered how much disdain I had for tip jars - it's like glorified panhandling, like taking money without offering anything in return. It's best to let the government handle such things.

Then Goose-steppin' Dana over at Note-it Posts turned me on to CafePress. For those of you who haven't heard of it, it's a great new service that allows bloggers such as myself to market gift items online without the hassle of setting up their own internet storefront. CafePress handles all the production and sales, I just create the artwork and collect the loot.

It seemed like a great idea, but I faced a serious conundrum: how to sell items without exploiting the working class or destroying our precious natural resources.

That's why every item in Liberal Larry's Fair Trade Gift Shop bears the Liberal Larry Fair Trade Seal, which is my solemn word that no labor was exploited, nor was the environment harmed in any way. Every skilled hand that touched an LLFT product is attached to a real human being, who is paid a Living Wage as described by the U.N., with full benefits, free health care, free day care, free housing, and Free Ivan the Gorilla. Every LLFT laborer works three hours a week at $750 an hour, and receives six months of paid vacation a year, plus paid maternity and sick leave. This standard of Fairness reduces community impact, insures biodiversity, provides shelter for migratory birds, and helps reduce global warming.

Now before you start firing off angry emails accusing me of selling out to capitalist ideals, remember that it's only "capitalism" if you compete with others to make a profit. I've purposely made the designs as crappy as possible in order to create a level playing field and prevent unfair competition, and in the remote chance that I make any money from this venture I will donate the proceeds to my favorite charity: my mom.

So don't be shy! March on over to Liberal Larry's Fair Trade Gift Shop and load up your carts with some Fair Trade goodies and save the world in the process.

July 08, 2004 in Announcements |

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» Oh Lordy, Lordy, Lordy from blogoSFERICS
As you may have noticed, my name for the category containing all things Kerry has again changed -- in honor of his choice of running mate. And, as occurred 20 years ago when Walter F. "Fritz" Mondale challenged Ronald Reagan for the p... [Read More]

Tracked on July 10, 2004 at 08:09 PM

» When capitalism meets communism from Note-It Posts
Liberal Larry has finally read enough of my entries that he has been converted to the wisdom and joy of capitalism. He's now got his own Cafepress store, full of items that point out how Bush has enhanced his life.... [Read More]

Tracked on July 11, 2004 at 12:29 PM

Comments

I think you misunderestimate capitalism. Selling low quality merchandise at rock high (Mt Everest) prices is the very ESSENCE of capitalism. Just ask John Kerry and his evil empire of halli-ketchup led by a board that has Ken Lay on it.

Posted by: Bad Commie | July 10, 2004 at 02:41 PM

Your link had some nonsense at the end of it.
http://www.cafeshops.com/blamebush%3Cbr%20/%3E
It should be just
http://www.cafeshops.com/blamebush
(Obviously, I found it anyway.)

Posted by: Kathy K | July 10, 2004 at 03:02 PM

I just found this site via Kathy's comment posted at Dr. James Joyner's latest blog entry.
http://www.outsidethebeltway.com

It looks interesting.

I am a staunch conservative and a College Republican, and I haven't been too happy with many of the policies of the Bush administration (on fiscal, social, and foreign policy issues).

Will look around here more...

Posted by: A. R. | July 10, 2004 at 05:01 PM

Considering your pricing Larry, I'm hoping you are making contributions to the DNC with the proceeds on anything you sell. Because it takes a lot of money to keep the Hair Party properly coiffured, keep Whoopie Goldberg in alcohol, Michael Moore in doughnuts and fried cheese, and someone has to pay for the Botox injections.

Posted by: Norman | July 10, 2004 at 06:35 PM

ACk! Ashcroft put nonsense in my link! The things this administration will do to silence dissent. Thanks for the heads up, Kathy.

Posted by: Liberal Larry | July 10, 2004 at 08:29 PM

That golden showers shirt is almost worth it.

Posted by: Amber | July 11, 2004 at 09:20 AM

I want one of those "Bush Ran over My Mother" Tee shirts for my dog.

You're too much Larry thanks for a bunch of laughs today, its been too long since I've been here.

Kerry in '04! He has great hair!

Posted by: Calliope | July 11, 2004 at 10:47 AM

What vile evilness! Creating discrimninatory clothing for "women". I suppose it's so we can stereotype them back into the kitchens and the maternity wards. And I think you were a good liberal . . .

Posted by: timmyhawk | July 11, 2004 at 03:42 PM

Can a "Bush Broke My Water" maternity shirt be far behind?

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you're a fucken genious.

hilarious to say the least.

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