Edward Kennedy; The Conscience of America

What I like about Ted Kennedy is that he's not only a man of truth and vision, buit he speaks with a clear conscience. He fought valiantly in Germany during the Korean War while Bush was partying with his rich white buddies in Kennebunkport. So I think the man is more than qualified to criticize Bush's bungling of the Iraq war.

You see, the good Senator from Massachussetts knows that with matters as important as national security, you can't just dive in headfirst without a plan. We should take our time, lie on the grass a while, smoke a cigarette, and think things through. We must seek the help of our friends, allies, lawyers, etc. and discuss the possible political ramifications of our actions. Then, and only then, should we report the accident.

Wait... we were talking about Iraq, weren't we?

Yes, yes...As the Senator said, Bush has created a "credibility gap as wide as Martha's Vineyard" with his stretching of the truth, and his outright lies about events leading up to and following the war. According to Kennedy, Bush got in over his head in Iraq, and now he's treading water. He's lost the trust of the American people by wandering aimlessly around in the dark while innocent lives are lost.

But that's all water under the bridge. Sure, a young woman is dead, but the most important thing right now is damage control. Salvaging the Senator's political career must be our top priority, and I don't care who we have to bribe or blackmail to make things right.

Whoa...did I stray off again?

Where was I?

Oh yes...the esteemed Senator Kennedy concluded his speech by attacking Bush's honesty, and comparing his presidency to that of Richard "Watergate" Nixon's.

"Saying whatever it takes to prevail has become standard operating procedure in the Bush White House," Kennedy said. "In this administration, truth is the first casualty of policy."

In other words, you can't just put on a phony neck brace and expect people to believe your sob story, Mr. Bush! Your rich and powerful daddy won't protect you now! You must level with the American People, and take responsibility for your actions, before the truth comes floating to the surface like the bloated corpse of your dead brother's secretary.

Comments

[CavalierX]

VERY well done... may be your best yet.

[SpaceMonkey]

Oooouuuuch, Rough stuff there, Larry.

By the way, Don't you DARE update your blogroll to link to my new url. We don't need you people over there at http://flyingspacemonkey.mu.nu , ok? Thanks for complying. The MAN has spoken.

Move along.

[Bitter]

Brilliant.

[Larry (really)]

Not enough is said about Ted Kennedy's SINCERITY when he discusses Dubya's dishonesty.

In the 1960 presidential campaign the Democrats argued about a "missile gap." The Russkies orbited the first satellite, the first Canine Casket(was Lyka the lucky pooch's name?), the first man THEN the first woman(apparently that was "her" sex; if not they also beat us on the unconventional-gender race in space.)

So, when Nixon and Kennedy became the designated candidates, President Eisenhower gave both of them access to security briefings. Many years after JFK was out of office the public learned, from multiple individuals who were part of JFK's campaign, that the security information convinced John Kennedy that there was not, indeed, a missile gap.

Kennedy did not stop campaigning about the missile gap, however, because the issue provided an electoral advantage.

It's likely that Sen. Ted Kennedy, in 2001, sincerely believes, "Surely the current President is no less dishonest than was my brother John."

[LC Mary in LA, G.L.O.R.]

Actually, I recall reading somewhere that the poor critter's nickname was "Limonchik" ("little lemon"), apparently from the color of her coat, and that "Laika" is the Russian name of the breed we know as the Alaskan Husky.
Googling... Googling... Googling...
Ah, here we go!
http://www.silverdalen.se/stamps/dogs/library/library_space_dogs_russian.htm
"Russian Space Dogs", article by Melissa Snowden. Apparently they just rounded up stray dogs and taught them to stay still for long periods of time, and they used female dogs because females don't have to raise a hind leg to pee. Go read the article. I can see I won't be getting much work done for the rest of the afternoon...

BTW, great site! :-)

[LC Mary in LA, G.L.O.R.]

Sorry, I should have quoted "Larry (really)" above, so that my comment would have made sense:

"...The Russkies orbited the first satellite, the first Canine Casket (was Lyka the lucky pooch's name?)..."

I "Blame Bush" for not enabling blockquote tags in his comments. ;-)

[Yaz]

Bunch of whiners. The lot of ya

[J. Ashburn]

Yes the pompuss ass makes babies out of wedlock.